Driven By Desire || Toto Wolff

27: Austria Day 1 (Toto)

"What if it's work?" She asks.

"Then they can live without you for the next 7 Days." I add. She laughs before lying down. It isn't long before Addison's fast asleep, her breathing soft. A song of hers comes on, and I listen to the lyrics smiling. I looked at the screen. Wilder Days by Morgan Wade. That name sounds familiar. The song is from the girls POV of wanting to know her boyfriend in his Wilder Days. It felt as if this was the soundtrack to what would be the next few days. It hits me, and then she was the girl who sang that one Kip Moore song I liked. 

I looked over at Addy and questioned when I ought to actually ask her to be my girlfriend. It felt like such a weird thing to say at my age. Asking someone to be my girlfriend. Most of the guys my age were married, and here I was wondering how to ask the girl I loved to be my girlfriend. I felt like I was 15 again. Except this wasn't a crush on the popular girl in school. This was love. There was no doubt about that. 

The drive wasn't too eventful. Addy had an hour power nap and was awake for the rest. She put on a different playlist of music from the 80s and 90s, and we sang them to our hearts' content. She wasn't the greatest singer, and neither was I, but somehow singing together was the sweetest melody I'd ever heard. When we reached Vienna and got off the autobahn, I pulled into a grocery store parking lot that looked deserted. 

"Let's go get food for our week," I say, getting out of the car, making sure to grab my wallet. I put my black cap back on and walked around to Addison's door. She's looking around for something. I open the door. "You okay? Missing something?" I ask.

"Yea, it's just a bit chilly. I thought there was a jacket in the car." She explains.

"Oh, here." I open the back door and grab the grey red bull zip-up hoodie from this morning. 

"Oh, perfect." She smiles, taking it from me and putting it on. 

I take her hand in mine, and we walk to get a trolley. Addison takes it, and I follow her. We walk around the shop getting snacks and drinks,  We grab things for the dinners and lunches we'll have back at the unit. We stopped in the cereal section for a few minutes arguing. 

"What do you mean We can't get cereal for breakfast?" She asks. 

"I said not that one. Anything except that one. That's just pure sugar with no nutritional value. Get something like bran flakes  or corn flakes, or if it has to be sugary coco pops. I'd rather have muesli and yogurt, though, " I state.

"Who cares if it has no nutritional value? It tastes good. But fine, we can get the muesli, you old man. " She grabs the bag and starts to walk. We go down the biscuit and tea aisle when Addison starts swinging her hips to the song playing. She grabs some coffee sachets and puts them in the cart, humming along to the song.  I pull her hips towards me, swinging her around. We glide to the music, and I smile at her laughter. She wraps her arms around my neck, and I lean down. Our lips connect, and It's like every time I kiss her, like she puts my soul to rest. When we pull away, I smile. She moves and grabs a thing of lemon tea behind me. I look up the aisle and swear I see somebody scurrying away, but I tell myself I'm seeing things and carry on shopping with her. We pay for everything before packing it in the back seat of the car. When we get back in the car, I lean over and Kiss Addy. I can see this being a thing we could do for the rest of our lives, weekly shopping when we're off. 

When we get to the Lodge I booked, I run inside reception and get everything paid before getting back in the car and driving up to the unit. I got one of the more private units. Private pool, no neighbors, far from most of their facilities. What me and Addy need. A place to be us without worrying about being caught.

When we pull  into the driveway, I look over at Addy, but she's already watching me smiling. I wink at her before getting out of the car. We grab out bags and walk through the door, and it's even better than the pictures. The unit is a U shape with the main focus of the house being the pool and trees outside. The left side of the unit had the lounge, and the bottom where we had just walked in had a dining table to the left and the kitchen to the right. The right side of the U had the bedroom where we put down our bags. Addy went to the bathroom while I grabbed the groceries we had just brought. When I walked back into the unit with the groceries, Addy had opened the rolling doors leading to the pool. I put the groceries down and stated, packing them away, watching her. She bends down and touches the water before looking up at the sky.  She stands up and walks back into the house, closing the door behind her. 

"That pool looks so tempting, but the weather is bad." She says, sitting down at the kitchen Island. 

"It should be better tomorrow. We can swim when we get back from our plans," I tell her.  She watches me narrowing her eyes.

"What's plans?" She questions.

"You'll see." I smiled before grabbing an onion. "Can I ask you to cut some tomato and clean the lettuce?" I ask. She nods before moving around the kitchen. When she opens a cupboard, I see a radio. I move my hand past her and pick it up. I turned it on before going to my favorite channel from when I still lived here.

A familiar song starts playing, and I start singing along. We spend the afternoon talking about random things, sometimes sharing stories other times complaining about work. We make burgers for dinner.

We sit down to eat, and Addison starts giggling. I look at her, and she smiles. "We've come full circle. Our first night together to made burgers for us and now a few weeks later we're on holiday having burgers." She says, making me smile. "It's not full circle full circle, but it's close enough." She smiles before taking a bite of her food.

"I wanted to speak to you about something, actually," I say without actually thinking. She nods, looking at me. "I know you haven't really officially dated anyone since Damien and I just wanted to know if there's a specific reason why?" I say, and I'm immediately regretting it. I feel like I've crossed a boundary I shouldn't have.

I watch as she swallows her food and pauses to think for a second. The longer the silence, the more anxious I get. "Truth be told, I think I've always been scared. The only people who I ever had any romantic chance with just reminded me of him too much. They were always around his age. Always blonde with blue eyes. Always just an inch shorter than me. And they always had that party mentality. They all just reminded me of him. And I think I was always chasing after him until my dad told me I needed to take some time to focus on myself and find myself. That's when I found my mom's camera and, in turn, found myself. Honestly, I haven't really cared about someone enough to want a relationship until you." I smile at her, and she swallows.

"Sorry if that's a bit too forward." She apologizes. "But honestly, Toto, you're completely different from everyone I've ever had romantic feelings towards. And that scares me a bit, but it also excites me. It's as if you're worth stepping out my comfort zone for," She tells me. I smile.

"I fully agree," I smile. And she smiles back before going back to her food.

I'm worth her stepping out of her comfort zone.

That sentence alone makes me confirm my plans for Friday.