널 사랑해 [Loving You] [Completed]

J Hope

The rest of practice was busy and fulfilling, though I realized that Jin consciously avoided me.
Once rehearsals were over, we all made plans to leave. Since everyone was going out, Jin offered to drive them all as they were going to malls around in the vicinity.

RM and JK sat together at the back, with Suga and Jimin occupying the last of the 6 seater SUV with V in the middle, leaving me the passenger seat at the front.

I climbed into the car and sat next to Jin as he drove off. He was a relatively careful driver, and the rest of us led in a spontaneous karaoke session as he drove. He jammed and sang along with us as he started dropping people off. After he had dropped RM and JK off, he looked at me. I was the only one pending.

"Where do you want me to drop you off?"

"You can just drop me off at the mall you are going to. I am just going to grab dinner before going home."

Jin nodded and continued driving. It was a quiet ride till the midway mark.

"Earlier. Whatever you said, what caused the change?"

I looked at him, wondering how to put my words so that he would understand me. I looked down at my clasped hands, which I was fisting tightly. There was a red light, so Jin stopped, and then I saw his hand on mine. I took a deep breath, and as he had to take off, I finally replied to him.

"It's not so much of a change. It's been there. In me. When you are comfortable with someone's presence in life and you know they will always be there for you, you wouldn't want anything to jeopardise that. To me; you are that person. I always see you as my person. When you told me you liked me, it struck me that there is a term for it. And I didn't know if that's the way I felt towards you... you aren't an option, Jin. You are way too important for that. To me, you are my need. My want. My choice. My one and only."

There was a spate of silence as Jin pulled into the carpark. I got out of the car and looked at him. I smiled wanely as I muttered, "Thanks for the ride, Jin. Have fun. Text when you get home?"

Jin just looked at me and nodded. Well, he didn't say anything else. What was I expecting? An answer to my proposal? I know I desperately wanted it, but I also knew I couldn't force it out of him. I had hurt him enough for him to be wary.

Jin took off, and I watched as he walked away. Just then, Suga called me. He asked me where I was and if I wanted to join them for drinks later. I agreed. Hearing my voice, he asked me what happened, and I filled him in. He just sighed but told me to give Jin time. I agreed softly and said I would see them later.

I had dinner in a cafe and made my way to go meet the boys. We bought drinks and went back to Suga's place so we could drink in comfort. We had the weekend off, too, so we could finally let loose. Jimin and V were busy singing and dancing whilst Suga silently bobbed whilst seated on the couch. I just sat in one corner, watching them and smiling as I slammed drinks. I didn't notice how many drinks I was having until Suga stopped me!

"Enough! You already had like 10 beers!"

I just smiled drunkenly at him. "It's ok, Sugaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa," and I think I never completed that sentence as I passed out!

I woke up hours later, in a somewhat unfamiliar bedroom. Where was I? I groaned as I tried to sit up.

"Feel like you have a heavy rock on your head or shoulders?"

"Uhh, uhhh." I tried croaking out and groaned even more. I felt a pair of arms around me, and the familiar scent hit me. It was Jin! I looked up at Jin as he sat me up straight and gave me a hangover drink. I nodded and tried to drink it. He helped me and then pushed my hair away as I was perspiring.

"Feel better?"

I tried nodding, but ugh, I felt terrible. Jin just laid me back into bed and asked me to sleep. I nodded whilst holding onto his arm tightly. I woke up again, a couple of hours, feeling more put together this time. I sat up, rubbing my face tiredly. I got out of bed and walked to the living room where Jin was there, watching the television. He turned around and saw me upon hearing my footsteps.

"How do you feel?"

"Better. I just feel thirsty."

Jin got me a nice glass of iced cold water.  I gulped it down and sat down. Jin gave me a pair of trackpants, an oversized shirt, and a towel. I had a nice long shower and came out to him cooking in the kitchen. I sat at the bar stools along his island table.

"What are you doing?"

"Making some soup for you."

"I thought..  I was at Suga's yesterday. How did I.. "

"End up here?"

I nodded. I wanted to dig a hole and bury myself as Jin filled me in on the story.

"You passed out yesterday after drinking. When Suga tried to wake you up, you threw a fit wanting to see me. I had to come over before you calmed down. I had to drag your ass home as you were busy throwing a fit. What was with you last night?"

I sighed as I apologised over and over again. Jin switched off the stove and came over sitting on the stool next to me. He took my hands in his.

"Look, I really like you a lot. I do. You mean the world to me, J Hope. And I hate seeing you like this. Stop hurting yourself, please."

I nodded, promising to have a better hold of myself.

"I'm sorry Jin. I really should have controlled myself yesterday given the young ones were around. I need to apologise to them too."

Jin assured me that everything was ok and that they just wanted to make sure I was fine.

"Do you forgive me?"

Jin looked at me for a long bit before finally sighing.

"Well, if I don't try forgiving my boyfriend, who will?"

I tried to keep the grin at bay but failed terribly as it overtook me completely.

Jin just smacked me on my head as he told me to watch it and that I would be in bigger trouble if I ever pulled that stunt again. I nodded as I leaned in closer to him.

Jin smiled as he covered the remaining distance and softly kissed me on my lips. I smiled into the kiss as we pulled away.

"Thank you for choosing me."

Jin just smiled as he caressed my face gently, leaning in again to commemorate the change in our relationship.