Dust:"!-...it's Dust..-"
Yan:"whatever. Tell us about this new passion project you've consistently pestering our news station about!."
Dust:"um...well.."
*Killer gives a thumbs up*
Dust:"...okay, as you all know I'm from dusttale and because of my history, I was sent here with you all for years. This is my new home and..you are my exp-- friends. We..just went through another extermination. And it breaks my soul seeing them get the exp that is rightfully ours! So why not switch the tables? I'm launching a first of its kind! A rehabilitation hotel for bad guys!"
*....*
Dust:"..ya know..cause hotels are for people passing through..temporarily..-"
a few bad guys sanses who are watching chuckle at this.
Dust:"it's a way to work towards...redemption..yay..-"
"Heh. Stupid bitch."
Killer punches that guy.
Dust:"..look..everyone here has some greater exp, I know yall do...!- maybe I'm not getting through to you."
Killer:"!- oh no.."
Dust snaps his fingers and a song starts to play
Dust:" I have a dream, I'm here to tell.
About a wonderful, fantastic new hotel
Yes it's one of a kind,
right here in Hell
Catering to a specific clientele
Inside of every demon is a rainbow,
Inside every sinner is a shiny smile!
Inside of every creepy
hatchet-wielding maniac,
Is a jolly, happy, cupcake-loving child!
We can turn them 'round!
They'll be heaven-bound!
With just a little time
down at the Happy Hotel!
So, all you junkies, freaks and weirdos,
Creepers, fuck-ups, crooks, and zeroes,
And downfallen
superheroes, hope is here!
All of you cretins, sluts and losers,
Sexual deviants and boozers,
and prescription drug abusers
Need not fear
Forever again
We'll cure your sin
We'll make you well,
you'll feel so swell
Right here in Hell, at the Happy Hotel!
There'll be no more fire
And no more screams,
Just puppy dog kisses,
and cotton candy dreams,
And puffy-wuffy clouds,
you're gonna be like "Wow!"
Once you check in with meeeee~!
So, all your cartoon porn addictions,
Vegan rants, psychic predictions,
Ancient Roman crucifixions
End right here!
All you monsters, thieves and crazies,
Cannibals and crying babies,
Frothing mouths that's full of rabies,
Filled with cheer!
You'll be complete! It'll be so neat!
Our service can't be beat!
You'll be on easy street! (Yes!)
Life will be sweet at the Happy Hotel~!
(Yeah!)
Everyone is silent..
"..wow. that was shit!"
Everyone erupts into fits of laughter.
Yan:"WHAT ON CHARAS GRAVE?! MAKES YOU THINK A SINGLE DENIZEN IN THIS MULTIVERSE, WOULD GIVE 2 SHITS ABOUT BECOMING A BETTER PERSON?! YOU HAVE NO PROOF THIS LITTLE EXPERIMENT EVEN WORKS! YOU WANT VILLAINS TO BE..GOOD?! JUST...BECAUSE?! AHAHAHAHHAHAHA!"
Dust:"...well..we have a patron already. Who believes in our cause..and he's shown incredible progress!"
Yan:"oh? And who might that be?."
Dust:"oh. Just someone named..Horror sans."
Swapfell:"the cannibal?'
Yan:"!-"
Yan scratches the Desk as he turns to swapfell
Yan:"you fucking would."
Swapfell turns away anxiously.
Yan:"in any case. That's not even an accomplishment. I'm sure you can get that canny to do anything with enough salt and butter and blood."
Dust:"oh. I beg to differ. He's been behaved. Clean. And out of trouble for two weeks now!."
YOU ARE READING
My Sans Aus Multiverse AUs Oneshots!
Fanfictionyeah, that's right, I'm doing this. au Ideas I have but don't have potential to be a full book, but still I can't handle enough to let it go soo-
Hazbin Hotel AU
Start from the beginning
