Begin Again | on hold

forty

After a moment, during which they hold hands in mutual peace, Sunny says, "I don't want to worry them. I got what I wished for – I've got you, and now I just want to live my life. I don't want to go back to having to explain everything."

"Fair enough. It's your life," Viv says, and she manages to make the words – usually dismissive – sound warm and loving.

Sunny's parents return. They stay outside until the colours of the sunset streak the sky, a powerful acrylic palette of orange and purple and red, and once the sun has dipped below the horizon and takes the heat with it, Martha's the first to stand, gathering empties.

"Are you two staying the night?" Sylvia asks, finishing off the last of her coffee.

Sunny looks to Viv as Viv looks to Sunny.

"I have to be up early tomorrow and Britney's all alone so I should get back," Viv says, "but you should absolutely stay if you want to."

Sunny thinks about it. A day alone in the flat, waiting for her friends or her girlfriend to finish work to hang out with her, or a dozy Sunday with her mothers and a gaggle of cats she grew up with.

"I think I'll stay," she says after taking a moment to weigh up her options. "Do you mind?"

Viv laughs, her hand on Sunny's elbow. "Of course I don't mind. You're the birthday girl – whatever you say, goes."

"In that case..." Sunny taps her fingertips together and wiggles her eyebrows like she's about to cause mischief. Viv rolls her eyes and playfully thumps her girlfriend as she stands, bending down to kiss her.

"I'll get going. See you tomorrow?"

"Mmhmm." Sunny smiles up at her.

"Happy birthday, bambi." Straightening her back and hitching up her trousers, she turns to Sunny's parents and says, "Supper was fantastic, as always. Thank you both."

Martha and Sylvia bat away her praise, taking it in turns to hug Viv and kiss her cheeks before she heads off back home to rescue Britney from her loneliness, and then only the Shelley women remain. As the night's clouds knit themselves together, they retire to the sitting room where Sunny throws herself on the sofa and stretches out.

"I'm very lucky," she says as her parents follow her into the snug where Martha starts to lay a fire even though it's nine o'clock. The thing about May in Black Sands is that no matter how warm it can get during the day, the minute the sun goes down, the chill sets in. It's not so bad here, a little further from the vicious North Sea, but it has cooled off considerably and the warmth of a flame is much appreciated.

"You really are," Sylvia says with a sigh as she sinks into her favourite seat and stretches out her long legs before tucking them under herself. "You've found yourself the most wonderful girlfriend."

Sunny grins. That word – girlfriend – still gives her butterflies. "And I have the best parents," she says, stretching out her foot to poke Martha's hip as she stands from the fireplace. Martha bows and sits beside her wife, her hand on her thigh.

"That, I can't deny," she says, pressing her lips to Sylvia's cheek. "Look at our kid. We did alright, didn't we? I spent so long worrying we were going to screw her up, but look." She gestures at Sunny, light dancing in her eyes. "We're so proud of you, baby."

Sunny laughs at that. "Proud of me? For what? Holding down the same coffee shop job for the last three years?" She does a quick calculation, taking into account the new year and the year she graduated and says, "Shit, four years."

"Come on, Sunny," Sylvia says. "Do you think your career is the only thing that makes you worthy of pride?" With a tut, she shakes her head. "That's just something you do. That's not who you are."