Tear: A Seaside Novel

Chapter Twenty-One

I had more homework than I thought possible. Weren't they supposed to lighten up after finals? It had been a week since Demetri and I'd had our fight or whatever that was. He still hadn't texted me back, and the media had been ruthless about Anjelica and their outings.

I was upset. But I had no right to be. Obviously we were over, but it still hurt. And yes, I had kissed his brother, and been guilty of loving him more than I should, but I had lost a friend, a good friend, and just looking at him on TV made me sad. He was supposed to be coming back in two days, and I wasn't sure I was ready to face him.

Alec and I hung out every night. We watched movies, played his stupid games, but he never touched me. Whatever had gone on between us was clearly over. He was back to his old respectable self, yet there were flickers of our past relationship. Sometimes when we ate popcorn and our fingers brushed, he would jerk back. I accidently fell asleep a few times during movies. It wasn't my fault his chest was more comfy than the couch. I hoped to God I didn't talk in my sleep because I almost always woke up sprawled across his lap.

"Nat, wake up." He would brush the hair across my face and then his hands would pull back as he waited for me to get up from the couch on my own and groggily walk back to my house. I shivered at the memories of the past week.

I shook my head and looked back at my homework. It was Friday and I wasn't in the mood. I decided to go to the beach and listen to music. I hadn't done that in a while and I felt more emotional than usual.

I put on a sweatshirt and ran out of the house. It took me five minutes to get to my favorite spot next to the tall grass that edged the white sand. The music soothed my nerves. Actually it soothed my fear and insecurity about everything going on with Alec and Demetri, but then again, music had a way of doing that. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.

I must have fallen asleep because I woke up extremely chilled. My teeth chattered as I grasped the sweatshirt tighter around me.

"So are you attempting suicide or merely stupid?" A dark voice asked from behind me.

"Hello to you too, friend," I grumbled stretching my arms above my head as I stole a peek at Alec.

His lips slightly parted, his tongue slipped out to wet them and then he cursed and ran a hand through his hair. "I didn't know where you were."

"Well, you found me." I shivered again but didn't want to get up, call it stubbornness, but I wanted to stay put.

"I swear you're aging me, Nat," Alec mumbled as he took a seat next to me and pulled me into his embrace.

"Sorry?"

"Not much of an apology, but I'll take it." He moved his hand quickly over my shoulders and then began massaging my neck. I moaned and dipped my head forward as his fingers dug into my sore flesh.

We sat there, silent for a few minutes, other than my moaning. His touch felt so good. He hadn't touched me since the dance.

"Alec?"

"Hmm?"

I swallowed the fear and pressed forward. "Do you trust me yet?"

I heard his deep sigh so I kept my head down as he continued to massage. "Getting there, Nat. Getting there."

Nodding, I licked my lips and stuffed my hands in the pockets of my sweatshirt. "Okay."

"Do you have plans tonight?"

I laughed. "You mean besides my failed suicide attempt?"

His hand stilled and then he pulled me into a side hug and kissed my head. "Yes, besides that."