Let my fires protect you || Kaz Brekker X Reader

19. Conflict

"You can't be sure."

"Yes. I can be." The affirmation in his tone, the absolute certainty that we wouldn't be imprisoned or hurt calmed me. Or maybe it was the glint in his eyes that told me that he'd fight tooth and nail to keep us safe that did it. Either way I spoke, "Nevermind then, you guys do need to stop. I don't agree with the barbarity of the Fjerdan court either but as stated earlier, we can't be having emotional outbursts that could get us killed."

"No, no, you see, this is what she does. She twists into all your minds and then -" What the fuck was he talking about? "Then?" Inej asked, crossing her arms, Nina glared at her, "Let it go, Inej." I was about to press her on but Matthias did the job for me. I was curious as to what she was hiding, what did she do to him that was so bad? Then Matthias told us what happened; how he was willing to drop everything for her but betrayed him. Nina then started to explain that she'd reported him as a slaver and threw herself at their mercy. Matthias had no idea what was happening, he hadn't known how to speak Kerch and was surprised when they seized him and threw him into the brig. I couldn't look at her, and my heart ached for Matthias. Why would she do such a thing to a man she claimed to love? She was about to explain when the ground shook. I immediately brought myself to the floor and covered my head, "What the fuck is this?" I asked, "I don't know." Jesper replied,his voice frantic. "Some kind of earthquake!" Inej answered, okay that made sense. Thank the saints for this woman!

"Are their fault lines this far north?" Wylan asked, "Not that I know of but-" Matthias was interrupted by slab of earth being brought up. I looked above me and around me and saw a person? I wasn't exactly sure and it made no sense but there was a person flying. "A Squaller." Inej stated, "Squallers can't fly." Nina retorted, her voice strained.

"One on Jurda Parem could." Kaz exclaimed, so Bo Yul-Bayur was manufacturing for them. Maybe they had a gun to his head at all time because that's a stupid idea. I was about to flick my hand when Kaz's gloved one hovered above it, "Your flame is a beacon to our location, if you want to fight use knives." It didn't matter because Jesper had gone to action and had shot them down with his perfect precision. "Perimeter. Make sure there are no surprises." Kaz ordered, Jesper and I nodded and sprang to action. Jesper went left, I went right. 

I made sure to keep low, I had changed my uniform from the original black that I used in Ketterdam to one of the palest white so I could blend in with the climate if I was ever told to do something like this. Inej had stuck with the purple because it was familiar to her, I understood, I missed my darks, and my mask. I just wanted to be back with my normal hair and my normal eyes. I liked the familiarity even if they were what caused me to get used like a brood mare at the Menagerie. 

~

It was when I started South and met with Jesper that I saw them. A band of Shu heading to Djerholm. We ran as fast as we could back to them. "What did you find?" We told them what we had found, "He was calling out for the Shu." 

"I'm pretty sure Ravka are at war with Shu-Han, aren't they?" Kaz nodded, "Then why is he calling out for them?"

"He must've been taken and then put on Parem to make him need them." 

"With no hope of returning home." Nina added, I didn't know him but the thought of him being forced to stay in Shu-Han because he couldn't live without Parem was unsettling. "How did they find us?" 

"Maybe it was (Y/n) almost destroying the world and fulfilling her fucking prophecy." Jesper complained, my anger started to simmer, "Or maybe it was you blasting your guns when you could've had Inej or I handle it in a more silent manner." Jesper's face went red, "Or maybe it was them two arguing all the time. They could've followed us for miles." So quick to put the blame on others but not himself, I was itching to say it but didn't want to cause an arguement when we had a bigger problem. There was loose Grisha hooked on Parem with the endorsemrnt of the Shu. "Let's move." 

"We need to bury them." 

"The grounds too hard, and we don't have the time. The Shu team is still moving towards Djerholm. We don't know how may Grisha they have, and Pekka's team may already be inside." Of course Kaz had to mention Rollins, enforcing the notion he refuses to accept. He is doing this to piss Pekka off more than anything. Yes, he may want the money but, as I now know, the vengeance for his brother will always be what comes first. "Nina, if you want I'll burn them, maybe their ashes can return to Ravka."  it was a compromise, speedy for Kaz and sort of respectful for Nina.

"No, that's too quick, they deserve a proper sending off." Oh for saints sake, "Do you want to build them a Pyre?" Kaz retorted, "Go to hell, Brekker." I'm pretty sure he's already been, then he came back. Death could not hold him, or was just too afraid to want him. "Do your job, Zenik. I didn't bring you here to do funeral rites." She lifted her hands, "How about I crack your skull open like an egg?" I placed myself between them and it was my turn for my hands to lift. "Do anything and we don't make it out of Fjerda alive. He's an asshole but we need him." I need him. "Why do you stick up for him?" I was incredibly conscious of my heartbeat, "Because arguing isn't going to get us anywhere." 

"Oh please -" Matthias stopped her, "Stop. I'll help. I'll help you dig the graves." I couldn't not express my shock, I guessed he felt he owed her that much as she was right about the hypocrisy of the Fjerdan government. 

We got instructions from Matthias and then left. "Are we sure it's okay to leave them alone?" Wylan asked, "No." Inej, Jesper and I said in unison.

~

Kaz and I had taken the lead with Jesper, Inej, and Wylan conversing and laughing about random, fun things like friends normally did. Even Jesper and Wylan were getting on slightly with Inej as mediator. I wanted to hold myself back and walk with them, allow Kaz to take the lead. I couldn't, not only because I was clearing a path but because I didn't want to part from him more than I wanted to go to them, invade on their happiness. I was miserable after everything and I'm worse in Djerholm. "You don't have to protect me from Zenik." 

"Really? I genuinely think she might have stopped your heart if Matthias and I hadn't stepped in." 

"And what if she stopped yours?" He turned to me and his brown eyes pierced my temporary blue ones, "She'd be ashes before she had that chance. She may be my friend but don't think that will stop me from trying to protect myself from any danger." The glare held for - what I thought was - a moment longer before a hand waved in between them and Kaz caught it's wrist. "Welcome back to the land of the living, folks. Let me catch you up on what's been happening while you lovebirds have been staring into one another's eyes." I flushed red and the heat was welcoming but uncalled for. Kaz also turned slightly red but I pretended to not notice "Nina and Matthias have returned to us, alive, I know what a shocker. Inej and I would like to rest as we are both still injured and need it, and the merchling is also tired because he isn't used to hard labour, just reading and making sub-par bombs." Jesper explained, "Hey!" Wylan complained, Jesper winked. "Okay, we'll take a break for five minutes then we'll continue." 

I took the opportunity to ask Inej how long we'd been stood there glaring at eachother, she said ten minutes. I smacked my head to my hands and prayed for sleep.

~

It took two more days of travel to reach Djerholm. I thought I would be terrified when I saw the city again, apparently I was numbed it to it now. 

A/n - If you were wondering, no her explosion of power wasn't the apocalyptic thing that I'd mentioned. It will happen though so be prepared. I'm sorry about the time it took again and I hope you enjoyed it