Questions // Mazerunner

27-In which we need a hand to hold

Nobody really knew where they were the next day either. Nick knew that Newt was having his day off and Frypan knew that Maddy was feeling a little ill, or so she said, and had taken a lot of sandwiches into the woods. Sandwiches which left a little trail of breadcrumbs all the way back to the witches house. Just like the fairy stories.

Maddy had told Newt when they returned to the glade the day before to meet her at what she now called 'their' clearing so that they could 'talk.' Newt was terrified. What did talk mean? Was it okay? Was she okay?

But beneath all the little worried that wore him down, he couldn't help but hope. Maybe, he kept thinking, just maybe, she might want me now. He knew it was silly. She had said after the maze, after this hell. He knew he had to stop. But he kept hoping she would be ready the next day or the day after that or today. Hope.

Maddy got to the clearing first. The branches there wrapped overhead, shielding them from the sky, except one tiny triangle of light. When it was nighttime, she could lay down on the grass and twigs and look up and find a tiny little glimmer of white in the dark sky. That tiny slither of light looked, to her, a lot like the hope Newt kept looking for. It looked a lot like Newt.

She laid down the picnic rug on the ground and sat down leaving the sandwiches to sit in a pile in the corner. The canvas sheet offered little protection from the spiky twigs and debris under it, but it made her feel better.

As if only she and Newt existed within that square. As if nothing else could ever matter. Just her and her best friend sitting, talking forever. Infinite.

Maddy heard Newt before she saw him. She had sat and thought for about ten minutes before she heard the first dull snap of twigs beneath feet. "Newt?"

"Maddy."

Newt emerged into the clearing and seated himself opposite her on the sheet. "What d'ya want with me then?" A hint of a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth, quickly removed when he saw her face. She was pale and ashen, as if she embodied the misery in this place. As if she'd sucked it out of everyone else and was beating it all on her own two shoulders.
"What's wrong?"

She took a deep breath and held up two fingers. "Two things." Newt turned his head slightly to the side, trying to see where she was going with this. "Are you okay?"

She nodded, albeit shakily, and continued. "Two things. One. Sorry. For everything. For cutting you off, for being a shank, for moving my hammock, for ignoring you. And all the other tiny uncountable things that I didn't even realise I was doing. Everything. Please Newt. Please forgive me." Newt nodded, silent and listening, taking it in.

"And for not being ready." Newts eyebrows creased as she continued. "I hate it but I can't till we get out of here, till we're safe. Definitely then. But to be continued, yes?"

The boy nodded and released his breath. For a second, that was the only thing that filled their own tiny grave. The soft release of a breath held too long, before Maddy continued.

"Two." Immediately, she started shaking more. Newts eyes were filled with worry and he began to reach out to her, to hold her, to hug her. She only shook her head.

"Two. You think you've found the way out, correct?" Newt wasn't sure what to say, "Maybe," was the only answer he could give.

"Newt please, yes or no?" Newts eyes betrayed him as he looked up and brushed his hand against his cheek. As he did so, another tear rolled down his face and Maddy leant to wipe it off. Her thumb wiped the water from his sun worn cheek and she smiled to herself. "Thank you for being honest."

She took another deep breath and started talking again, looking Newt straight in the eyes. He looked down at her hands, constantly rubbing up and down the fabric of her trousers. She was nervous. It was bad.

"So the only other way that we could get out is my memories right? But I can't remember. I haven't remembered for too long." Newts breathing was getting faster and faster, so Maddy took his hand, slowly rubbing her thumb over his rough skin, comforting, caring.

"If I don't remember soon, I'm going to do something to get at least one memory back. Just one." She nodded as if to reassure herself. "Just one."

"How?" It was all Newt could think to say, all he could focus on. "How are you going to get your memories back?"

Maddy raised her eyes to the leafy roof and chewed her lip slowly. "You know my first memory? BMM. Me, Ben and Mark, wherever the hell he is. That's what started it all." Newt was shaking his head, muttering over and over under his breath,"No, no, no, no." He was hardly stopping to breath.

"So I-," she stopped agin and collected herself. "So I thought that the only way to get them back was to jump again, to jump in the maze. And you told me about that ladder you found so I can use that and then we can get out."

Newt was shaking, sobbing into Maddy's shoulder as she held him and she was crying to, crying for him. "It'll be okay," she murmured in his ear. "We'll get out."

"Pl-lease Maddy. Please don't. I need you," he whimpered, small as a little boy, scared by the massive world in front of him, terrified to death to let go of the hand he was holding.

"And you'll still have me. And we'll be free. But Newt, please listen. There's one more thing."

"What? Just please don't leave me."

Maddy sat back and looked into his eyes. "I won't leave you but," she paused, biting her lip and drawing blood. "But I might need someone to help."

A/N I'm so sorry. Writing that made me so sad. As always appreciate votes/reads/comments very much so thank you.
-Katie