PANIC ROOM • KENJI KON

XLII. Pure of Heart

Darius grinned. "I knew learning about dino diets would come in handy."

"This place is so dope," Kenji said as he took a seat on the bed beside Eva. She scooted to the left to give him more room. He handed her a bag of Lays— her favorite— and a bottle of water. "Why don't we just crash here from now on?" He opened a pint of chocolate ice cream and began devouring it.

Eva sat up and cracked open her water, drinking it happily.

"Yeah, I'm sure the tarbo and all the other dinosaurs that know about this place now would love that," Yasmina retorted. "They'd get snacks, too. Us."

Kenji leaned into Eva's side. "You know, you're not dead yet."

Eva brought her leg foot onto the bed, hugging her knee close. "People always say when you're about to die, your life flashes before your eyes. Well, that's not really true, but there was this sudden, crushing anxiety that I've done nothing worthy in life and my death wouldn't impact anyone... And well, I don't know. You were kinda my knight in shining armor tonight, and I'm seriously sorry for being such an ass. You know... Of everyone at Rutherford that I could've been stuck with here on the island, I'm glad it was you..."

Kenji gave her a lopsided grin, then stuck a spoonful of ice cream into his mouth.

Ben's voice cut through their moment. "Also, this place is just a little tight for all of us. And trust me, Bumpy does not like sharing her sleeping spot."

"Doesn't mean we can't spend the night," Kenji said. "Today was exhausting, we could haul the food tomorrow, when the sun's up?"

"Sure."

"I'm down with that."

"Sure, why not?"

Yaz and Sammy eventually laid down on the couch. Darius took the spinny chair with his feet propped up on the desk, and Brooklynn and Ben made their bed on the floor. Eva stayed in the bed, and unsurprising to her, Kenji stayed next to her.

~~~

Eva breathed in, choking on air. Her eyes sprung open, and she looked around the dark room wildly, confused about where she was. But all she saw was darkness, cold and bitter. Sweat beads lined her forehead, and her hair was soaked in it. She climbed over the right side of the bed, over someone's legs, then her socks hit the floor and she was suddenly falling. Her head smacked against the corner of the wall, and she laid on the ground, staring up into nothingness.

She sucked in a breath, her heart beating erradically in her chest. Patting around the ground, her hand brushed over books, then a figurine that felt like a robot. Then another, higher up, that vaguely reminded her of the mosasaurus. And then everything came crashing into place. She was in the bunker they had searched for all day the previous day. And then she remembered everyone agreeing to sleep and leave in the morning.

After scrunching her eyes shut for several moments, she walked across the bunker, occasionally tripping over chair legs and wall corners. She entered the pantry, carrying herself to the corner, where she slid down the wall and pulled her knees to her chest.

Every time Eva closed her eyes, she saw golden light filtered through green water. She saw air bubbles escaping her. She felt cold. Dead. Goosebumps climbed up her arms and down her legs like rushing water. Tears welled in her eyes, threatening to spill over.

"Hey..."

Eva jumped, slamming her head against the wall behind her. She muttered multiple fucks, grasping at her head.

"Sorry!" Kenji whisper-shouted.

Kenji slid into the spot beside her with minimal effort, though not speaking once.

Why was he here? Couldn't he just... go away?

Eva kept her face forward. "Why are you here?"

"You punched me in the balls, but you sound like you're crying so... are you.. are you all right? Cause like, I totally thought you had left the bunker... totally glad you didn't, though."

Eva kept silent.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"I almost died..."

"We almost die a lot, you're going to have to be more specific."

Eva shoved his knee, sighing. "You know what I mean. I almost drowned..."

"But you didn't. Yay!"

She stretched her legs out in front of her. "Kenji, what if we never get off this island? It's been so long I lost count of the days. I... We... I'm.. I'm tired of fighting for my life. Dinosaurs, food, my freak near drowning accident. What if that's all that's left in store for us? Never getting off this island?"

Kenji placed a careful hand on her knee. His voice came out gravelly, "Didn't you hear Brimford's message about us getting out of here?" He sighed. "Eva, we're getting off this island. It might not be tomorrow, or next week, but we will get out of here. All of us. I swear."

Eva dropped her head onto Kenji's shoulder, but still didn't speak.

After a while, he asked, "Do you want to sleep?"

"I woke up drowning. I don't really think sleep is the best thing for me right now."

"Well, I'll be there by your side. I'll help battle your demons, if need be."

She snorted, then pulled her knees back to her chest.

I wish it was that easy.

But then she closed her eyes, and took a deep breath, before staring back into the darkness. "Fine."

"Fine?"

Sighing, she stood to her feet, wiping at her cheeks. "Let's go, Pretty Boy."

The two climbed into bed carefully so as to not wake any of their sleeping friends. Eva laid on her back, her eyes locked on the ceiling. Kenji was directly next to her, the two shoulder to shoulder, side to side. As she coaxed her mind into thinking about anything but drowning, her thoughts were plagued knowing Kenji was lying there completely awake.

Turning over in bed, she made the conscious decision to burrow into his side. His arm slipped away from her gasp, and instead hung around her shoulders.

"Shut up," she whispered.

"If it works, it's not stupid," he whispered back.

And though neither could see one another, they were both varying shades of red, refusing to even glance at the other.