The Last One

nine

Well, into the evening, we stopped and made camp. I fell into the routine of setting up camp, and we all seemed to move in harmony, setting up camp in no time. As the fire sparked to life, my mind drifted back to that first night I had wandered into their camp - a camp not so different than this one. I had been so afraid, so untrusting, but I looked at the men now and felt comforted.

We didn't speak for a long time. We just let the night settle over us like a warm blanket. The fire popped as a piece of wood burned in half, I tossed another piece in and watched as it caught fire, too. The silence we shared now was not uncomfortable, and in fact, it was pretty pleasant.

Finan laid down on his bedroll and passed asleep quickly. Uhtred stated he was taking the first watch and that we should rest. I nodded my head in agreement before laying down on my bedroll. My eyes didn't close, though, and instead desired to watch the flames lick the darkness.

"I am sorry about last night." Sihtric whispered. His bedroll was behind mine slightly, and his head was rested just behind my head.

He was sorry? Why? Did that mean he regretted it? Shame ripped at my chest. My heart fluttered against my ribs in disappointment, and all I could say back was: "Oh."

"I got carried away." He assured softly. His words didn't make me feel better at all. I had liked it, had encouraged it even, and now I felt awkward and ashamed. I swallowed my emotions and said nothing, looking into the flames instead.

"I am not." I grumbled. I realized too late that I had said this out loud instead of just in my head. My cheeks burned as I awaited his reply.

"Me either then." He said it so softly that I almost didn't hear him. It took a few moments for it to register, and then when it did, my breath hitched in my chest. I tried to steady my heart rate and breathe normally, but I'm sure I was obviously affected by his words.

He didn't speak again, and neither did I. His proximity was like a splinter in my skin, and I so desperately wanted to look at him, reach for him, kiss him even. I did nothing, and nor did he.

The next day, we were in Rumcofa. We all split and went in different directions, but all probably with the same goal in mind: bed. I spent the entirety of the evening and night asleep and only woke the next morning when someone knocked on my door and startled me awake.

I was still rubbing sleep from my eyes when I opened the door to find Finan. "Craven? Are you ready?"

No, I wasn't ready. I was barely awake. I looked down at my nightclothes and shook my head. "Look like it?"

"Well, someone's not a morning person!" He chuckled. "I will be outside."

It was true. I had never been a morning person. It had been a struggle to rise from bed my whole life, and now was no exception; even with a goal in mind. I started getting dressed with slow, tired movements, but by the time I was tightening my armor onto my chest, I felt awake enough. I wadded my braid into a ball as I walked, tucking it under itself and wrapping a leather strap around it to secure it to my skull.

Finan was outside along with Sihtric. They were standing across the street, talking to a Dane I didn't recognize. To be fair, I didn't recognize most people here. I had been so consumed with my own motivations that I never even made any connections to others that lived here. Sihtric made eye contact with me as I approached, and the man was dismissed.

"Craven?" I asked.

Finan nodded slowly. "We can go when you're ready, but, Red.." I locked my eyes onto him as I waited to hear what he would say. "Are you sure? It doesn't sound like you will find anything but pain."