𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭 ˢᵏᶻ

.𖥔 ݁ ˖๋ ࣭ ⭑ another day

for changbin,

have you been well lately?

i don't know if the news reached you yet, but we lost two other families recently. our old classmate, lee chaeryeong, and her family got caught in the middle of an unsuspecting air raid last night. unfortunately, the hwangs' were over there too celebrating their daughter's birthday.

it was a massacre. they never saw it coming.

all that survived was half of the kitchen table and a candle with the number '10' on it.

mama says that the men from our town need to enlist, and that includes you. i saw the posters being displayed in the town hall when i was out getting groceries. nobody cares about your age or health issues or family status anymore. as long as you can hold a gun and are willing to fight, you're halfway to being a solider - apparently.

the whole ordeal seems absurd to me. doesn't the army have enough men already? plus, they promised that fighting would be finished by summer, but it's august now and i've buried more bodies than there are houses on this street. i couldn't bear burying yours, too.

this morning, my brother had started packing his bag so that he could head off with a regiment at the end of the week. it irritated me how eager he was to leave, so i gave him a piece of my mind. he shouted back, saying that he wasn't just gonna sit by and watch the world burn. not if he could do anything about.

i didn't have the heart to tell him that this place has been doomed from the start. that the only thing we can do is pray that we'll make it out with our own lives.

i wonder; do you feel the same way?

mama's calling me for dinner now. you know how angry she gets if i don't go to her immediately. so i'll try keep this short.

but before you leave, take my name tag and give me yours. and if you die in this stupid war, i won't tell them we switched. i'll let you be buried under my name, and in some 50 years, i'll be buried under yours.

that's my promise to you.

and i swear i'll find you again in my next life, so that we can laugh over a bottle of whisky and i can be yours for another day.

it's getting late. hopefully the mailman will get this to you unscathed by first light tomorrow.

until then.

with all my love,

✰