At the End of That Memory

Chapter 20

At the End of That Memory -Chapter 20

My room was a small space close to the entrance. They said it was renovated as soon as I was left, and that it was now a place for employees to stay. There was also a small toilet inside, so it wouldn’t be a bad idea for them to use it.

I spent my time in the drawing room in silence until dinner time. My father didn’t come out of the study, and my mother didn’t come down from the second floor either. They probably wouldn’t have come down to where I was unless the house caught fire.

I sat there for two hours. It started raining outside the window. The sky where the sun had disappeared was covered with dark clouds, and a drizzle poured down in the dark space.

‘I’m not asking you to steal it, I’m just saying let’s see to it quickly.’

I stared at the rainy scenery endlessly. I reflected on what my father said and weighed what I should do and what I should not do.

‘You are the hero of our company, Sejin.’

I didn’t want to be a hero, I just wanted to be a son. My father, who was unable to grant even that simple wish, expected something grand like this. Without even asking what I wanted or anything like that. My father claimed my duties instead of giving me my rights.

‘…If Kwon Yido finds out, he will definitely break off our engagement.’

I tried to muster up the courage to say it, but it didn’t work on my father. He just patted my shoulder as if asking me something obvious.

‘Breaking your engagement? You have never been married.’

Yes, it was true. We weren’t married, we just made an unconditional promise.

‘You have to think carefully. Do you think this marriage will be successful if you don’t bring this?’

‘…’

‘No, he will abandon you.’

The floor continued to eat me. As if I had fallen into a deep pool, I was sinking slowly, starting from my ankles. My father’s hand on his shoulder felt heavy like a weight was hanging from it.

‘The only one you can trust is your family.’

I wanted to ask. Was I included in that family? Was there a place for a son who didn’t become a hero?

‘What can you do after being abandoned like that, since you are no longer the Director?’

I have always lived by solving situations right in front of me. It meant I did not worry about the distant future and lived by resolving conflicts right away. But this time, I kept guessing what could happen later. My mind, which was shaking like a buoy on the sea, was about to turn over without any sense of purpose.

‘You just have to do well. Even if that guy throws you out, don’t you have a place to come back to?’

Was there really a place for me to return to? Even if I was abandoned by Kwon Yido or if my engagement was broken off, wouldn’t my father be disappointed in me? Wouldn’t he throw me away without any hum and haw since I was done and dusted with everything?

‘You know who raised you until now, right?’

‘…Of course.’

Why wouldn’t I know that? If it weren’t for my father, there wouldn’t have been anyone to pick up something like me.

‘Yes, great that you understand. You’re my son, so of course you should be wise.’

It was a feeling that cannot be expressed in words. I wasn’t upset or in pain, but I felt nauseous like I was going to vomit. If I made a mistake, something that was suppressed might burst out.