Text Sent 4 months ago; Pre-breakup
"No. I don't want to not talk to you and I know that's what you want but I can't. In the past two hours I can't move. I can't. I need you. You're the air in my lungs. You're the only thing I have. I love you with all my heart, and I have for nine and a half months. I don't want to hurt you anymore and if you need time that's ok but I'm sorry I push you away. My life is really fucked up and our lives fit together so perfectly. We are meant for each other. My friend told me that when I grow up and I'm really old that my husband will be on the front porch with me and kiss me on the forehead and that I'll forget all about you but you're who I want to be with. Forever. And always. You're my everything and I can't live without you. I can't. I need you. And I love you. I was looking at our pictures and when we went through that rough patch, you said stuff about how I only had one more chance and that scared the shit out of me cause I fuck up a lot and I'm sorry but I don't want to lose you. I don't want to live without you. I'm sorry I've hurt you but I'm so scared. Don't give up on me. I'll try to talk to you more and we will see if we can hang out more. If you're done I understand and I can't promise that if we do fix it that it will be perfect but we can try. I'm 15 and I'm trying to discover who I am and it's hard and I shouldn't have let it come between us. And I'm sorry but there aren't words that can express how I feel. I can't lose you and sometimes crazy shit goes through my head and I get paranoid and I make rash decisions. And I know thats not fair to you but I'm sorry. That's who I am. I'm also someone with a shit dad figure and that's what I'm used to. I'm uses to boys and males treating me like shit and you came along and you were different, and that scared the shit out of me. So I bailed out, multiple times. I have serious trust issues. All I wanna do is lay my head on your chest and kiss your fucking lips and love you. I want to be with you forever and ever. And if I fucked that up I'm sorry, but that's how I feel. If you still don't want to talk I get it. I still love you and always will. You're my baby, and I'm your boo bear. You're my Mr.Sexy and I hurt myself when I fell for you. You're everything beautiful in the world. And I love you."and
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Text Sent 2 days ago; Post-Breakup
"The part that hurts the most is that when this is over, you won't regret leaving. You won't miss me. You'll never think back and say, "I wish I still had her." You were so ready to move on and that hurt like shit. Be honest with yourself. I'm not what you want anymore. You can find someone else. In the very beginning you swore you would never hurt me and you promised me you weren't like the other guys and maybe I was just blind because I fell in love too fast but maybe this was destined to end. Maybe this is just a lesson. To not trust anybody because everybody lies and changes. We almost broke up a couple of times. And I fought for us all of them. I remember the text you sent me and maybe that should have been the end. Except we both still wanted each other. This time the want is one sided and it's crushing me. I'm falling into depression and I'm losing sleep. And I'm tired. So I know what I want. But until you know. I'm going. I'm breaking and I think I'm going to try to move on. I probably won't be able to but right now, I feel like your going to end up moving on and leaving me and I'm going to be stuck. So until you make up your mind. I'm going to try to move on. I won't be able to and I'll always be the girl that was broken. But that can't change now cause I already am the girl that's broken. And you don't want this."
He broke me. And I have went 0 days in the last 3 weeks without crying. It's not getting better and I don't know what to do.
