Bitter (wlw) (teacherxstudent)

eighty-eight

"I'll go pay the bill" Sam said after a while we finished our desserts.

"You don't have to-" Lauren attempted to say.

"I know, but I will" she cut her off as she got up.

"How are you feeling, El?" the blonde asked after a while, as I realized I'd been staring at Sam as she walked to the cashier counter. I'd told Lauren about everything a while before, so I knew what she was referring to.

"I'm...good. Pretty nervous but good. Actually, very nervous"

"Yeah, I can imagine. I'd be shitting myself too" she said with a chuckle. "But I'm sure it'll go well. I really am"

"I hope so" I sighed.

"Trust me, she'll be really happy. Probably the happiest she's ever been. You've got this" she reassured me.

"Thanks" I said, feeling slightly relieved.

When Sam came back it wasn't that easy to pretend that conversation hadn't just happened, but I tried my best to look like I had no reason to be nervous at all.

"We'll see you tomorrow too, then?" she asked her sister as we headed out, taking my hand into hers.

"Oh, uhm, of course. If you feel like it"

"Why wouldn't we?"

"You never know" she just shrugged, briefly looking at me.

"You're weird. But thank you for coming this evening" Sam said as the two hugged.

"No problem" she laughed. "See you two tomorrow then"

"See you" I said as she walked away, realizing how different things would be the following day.

"Shall we go upstairs?"

"Yeah" I nodded, following her to the elevator.

Once we got to the room, I tried to discretely check if the small box I'd been hiding in my suitcase the whole holiday was still in my pants' front pocket, and I felt a wave of tension as I realized I was actually about to do what I'd imagined in my mind countless times for the past months.

"The view from the terrace is fucking amazing" Sam said, interrupting my nervous thoughts.

"I know. I did the right thing to get us this room, didn't I?" I walked to her.

"Definitely" she smiled. "I wanna go outside"

"Same" I said, thanking the universe that I wasn't going to act like I spontaneously wanted to go on the terrace as if I didn't have a clear reason. I still hadn't gotten good at lying.

I tried my best to swallow the knot in my throat and ignore the fact that my hands were starting to shake, partly because of how excited I was. I took a deep breath in, admiring the city's landscape from above.

"I think you're starting to like London even more than I do, aren't you?" she chuckled, wrapping her arms around my waist from behind.

"Maybe I am" I said, turning to my side and smiling just at the sight of her. "I think it's mostly because I associate it with you"

"More than New York?"

"I'd say so. I mean, New York is obviously where everything started and we probably wouldn't be here if we both hadn't moved there. But I feel like London is when your true authentic self comes out. Not that you're not authentic in New York, I mean-"

"I get it" she laughed lightly.

Was I seriously already going to fuck it all up?

"Okay, yeah" I giggled. "Especially the first time we came here, you showed me all the places you'd grown up in and allowed me to know more about you than you'd ever told me. I feel like that's when our relationship became actually serious" I added, and I really did mean it. That was the reason I was waiting to be specifically there to do what I'd been planning on.