Is that possible? // English (Helena Bonham Carter)

2

The second day of shooting. Sandra and Cate want to talk to me, about what, I don't know. Since I'm not needed until the afternoon, I can watch the others for now.

"Hello, Kaydi. How about joining us for a coffee?" Sandra asks, and I nod. It's nice and warm in the cafeteria, and Cate is already there, but not alone. Helena is sitting next to her.

"Oh, well, I'll just go. I'm sure you two have a lot to catch up on, and there wasn't any time for that yesterday."

"No, no, please stay. I don't think Sandra and Kaydi would mind," Sandra shakes her head.

"I'll be right there," I say and go outside for some fresh air. I go to the smoking area and light one up. I had quit smoking, but I still smoke occasionally to clear my head.

The conversation and Helena's actions keep bothering me. I'm afraid of developing feelings for her and ending up in an awkward situation. I'm afraid of reading too much into the situation, of doing something wrong, and just afraid of being disappointed in the end. I thought I had left my trust issues behind, but they're still there.

"Hey, is everything okay? I'm sorry if I talked too much yesterday or was too pushy..." Isn't there a saying? Speak of the devil. (in Germany)

"Hey, n-n-no, no, everything's fine. So, yes, it's because of you (?). Well, actually, yes, but... oh, forget it." I knew I was stuttering!

"What do you mean?" She asks, which is somehow understandable.

"It's complicated... g-give me some time and don't think about it, even though my words just contradicted that," I say. She only nods and leaves me alone.

-Helena's POV-

I have many questions. What did she mean by that? What does it have to do with me? Was I too pushy? Did I say or do something wrong? Phew, I don't know.

"So, what?" Cate asks as I return.

"It's on me. It's complicated. She needs time. I shouldn't worry about it," I respond.

"Tell me your questions."

"What did she mean by that? What does it have to do with me? Was I too pushy? Did I say or do something wrong?"

"Why would you be pushy? Yes, I know you called her, but you had a nice conversation, right?" Cate asks again. Sandra is just following our conversation.

"Yes, there was the conversation that might have caught her off guard, and/or when, before the first scene, I took her hand and smiled at her encouragingly."

"Helena, you need to know that Kaydi tends to overthink things. She's afraid of reading too much into a particular situation and getting involved. Plus, she has trust issues due to her past. All of this is amplified by the success of her parents and her wealth. With such a background, it's normal for her to react this way," Sandra explains.

"She might need someone to help her build trust in other people. Ideally, a stranger she can trust. I, or rather, we, don't expect you to help her, and honestly, we don't think she even wants to associate herself with you with the thoughts likely going through her mind right now. And it's not precisely about you."

-Kaydi's POV-

The shoot in the afternoon is uneventful. Of course, Helena and I have eye contact, and we embrace, but it's only because it's part of our roles. I mean, why else? Nevertheless, I can tell that her mind isn't completely on the task.

"Cut! Helena, what's going on? Short break, and then we'll continue!" the director calls. I look at her with a question, but she just waves it off. I step aside a bit and see Cate walking over to her. What's going on with them?

To put it bluntly, today was a terrible day. Helena, Sandra, and Cate are hiding something. Helena is worried about me and neglecting her work as a result. I've admitted to myself that I have feelings for her, but she doesn't feel the same way. And she's pregnant, which makes the situation even more complicated. We haven't managed to shoot the scenes we wanted because I completely messed up afterwards. My parents are in the news again. OMG, how wonderful they are. cough cough. And once again, I'm completely insignificant. Great...