Lupus Deus (Published on Amazon)

(C19)

My conscious.

I had no doubt that as soon as Vivian saw me that she'd beat my ass and sadly enough, I was okay with that. It was the least I deserved with all the crap I pulled on her, but sometimes I really just couldn't help behaving like an ass, a controlling, cold-ass to be precise. It was more than just a bad habit to me.

Before her I could think things through without a thought, enter a battlefield without a care about the numbers and deaths. I was running from place to place, going where I pleased, taking what I wanted and most of the time later destroying it at the end for fun. Thinking back on my behavior, I frowned.

And now. . . Now I couldn't focus on one thing without linking it to her, I couldn't use the link because it would undo the direct command, using it on her was risky enough with her changing, I wasn't stupid, I knew her changing would mean the direct command would no longer work on her, if anything it would be nothing more than a really strong request, but with her still not changing yet it had an effect, not as strong as I thought, but still strong.

While I couldn't use the link to her, blocking my emotional and physical bond from her, she had no idea she was subconsciously sending me her emotions, I was thankful in a way, I could keep track of her without actually doing it. I knew the direct command hadn't worked as planned when she first woke up, immediately after confusion, longing and a hint of anger so small it think even she couldn't feel it went through the bond.

The only other way I knew she wasn't aware of what was going on was because she hadn't discovered my mark on her. While she had been asleep, I had sent another witch in to perform a spell similar to what was around the island. A spell to hide my bite mark on her but still have the same 'Keep unmated males away' trait. To her nothing would seem strange if she were to gaze at her neck, she wouldn't even notice that the mark of her pack which identified each wolf of every pack had faded as soon as my mark took place. I had to do a lot of mind-changing and string pulling to get her back into the pack along with her parents without anyone questioning her about disappearing, as far as they knew she went to her cousins pack and came back a few days after the attack. Nothing more nothing less.

The only problem was that as the days passed Vivian's two weeks were almost over and the direct command would begin to fade slowly as her new side emerged. Any little reminder of anything could spark a memory or give her, as she's been sending through the bond, deja vu or a sense of strong discomfort for lack of unexplained confusion.

Giving her the same guards as she had here had been a huge risk to take, but they had spent the most time with her outside of myself, at least in a way they would be a comfort to her. But selfishly enough, I secretly hoped they would fuck up and get seen by her, sparking her memory. It was bad, I know, but it was just a small part of me. The larger part rather her stay away while I deal with this and later face her wrath.

I sensed two wolves nearing my office, my mood darkening as I was forced to pause all thoughts of Vivian. Albericus and my third in command Hogan Langer walked in. I had met Hogan around twenty years ago, the brown-haired brown-eyed man seemed good for the position, he was neat, organized and kept track of everything. Except for how the message got out. Hogan was, as always, dressed to impress, black dress slacks with a purple shirt and black tie, it was no secret he swung for the other team and I had no problem with that.

I did, however, have a problem when people didn't do their jobs correctly, especially at the cost that was happening.

Albericus closed the door and stood beside Hogan who had his arms over his chest as he looked down at his black dress shoes. I looked at him and narrowed my eyes, then looked over to Albericus to proceed. Clearing his throat he began.