Bit Into Your Love {SAPPHIC}

🩸Black Suit (pt.47)🩸

I sniffled and wiped my nose before I could have time to cry.

"Do you know the name of the antidepressants you were on?"
I shook my head, "I forgot."

I hated coming to sessions, it made me feel like a little kid again, staring down at the ground and crying. One-word answers.

"That's okay," she said with a smile in her voice.
"What has been going on in your life since I saw you last?"

"Wh-when was the last time I saw you?" I asked, looking up at her.
"I believe it was around two and a half years ago."

"Oh...wow, um, it hasn't felt like that long."
She smiled, "Clearly you've been keeping yourself occupied, then."

"Well, I just had my second baby,"
"Really?"

"Yeah," I said, a genuine smile spreading across my face. "He's perfectly healthy, as well."

"Well, congratulations. I remember when you told me you were pregnant with your first,"
"how old is he?"

"Almost three months," I replied.
"Wow! If you want, you'll have to show me pictures."

I smiled and realized my leg had stopped shaking.
"I do have some,"

I took my phone out of my back pocket, quickly swiping through my photo album. I realized almost all of the ones I had of Theo were with his skin completely pale. Samantha obviously couldn't see that.

"Well, here's my firstborn. This was a little while ago, she's two now." I turned my phone around for her. It was the picture of Melanie with her hands up on the rock at the park.

Samantha hummed, "That's a very nice picture, my kids also love that park."

I took my phone back and found the picture of when Theo was first born, when his skin hadn't gone snowy yet. "Here's my little crier."
It was true, Theo cried much more than his sister had.

I turned it back to her.

"That's a beautiful baby you have, Marine."

I smiled, slipping my phone back into my pocket. "Thank you. I guess, I just didn't expect to be so upset about it. I mean, not about the baby, just..."

She waited for me, but it was hard to find words.

"I mean, I was happy with my first. It felt like she had healed me. Maybe it's because I went off the medication, I don't know. I just constantly feel tired, and my headaches haven't stopped even after the pregnancy."

"Did you feel an urge to get off the medicine?"

"Not exactly? I just hated how it felt like I was completely dependent on it. Like two tiny pills controlled my entire mood."

"That's completely understandable, it's not just you who feels like that either. You're not alone." She reassured me. "I'd like you to go to the doctor, okay? You may need to be prescribed a new medication, Marine."

I sighed.

Samantha set her clipboard to the side. "I know this is going to be hard, but I truly believe you're strong enough to get through it."

~~~

"Mommy!"

As soon as I walked through the door, Melanie came running. She hugged my leg.

I kneeled down, putting my arms around her, "Hi, lovely,"

Cleo chuckled, "I think she missed you."

I hummed and gently rubbed my little girl's back. She was tightly gripping onto me.