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The first thing I notice when my eyes open is how light it is. It's almost like everything is white like I'd expect heaven to be.

When I was small, my mum believed in God, heaven and hell, and all about angels. She never told me about it until I was old enough to ask questions. She kept her prayers silent and to herself, though every Sunday she would go to church by herself. 

When I asked her about it, she told me that when she and Dad got together, he told her he respected her belief, but never believed himself, so she went to church every Sunday. Though he didn't go, he always went with her to Christmas and Easter services, until they had me and he'd look after me while I went. He always did everything he could to support her, and they respected each other's values.

Mum told me when I asked that for her, her belief wavered while she and Dad were trying to have kids – she lost two pregnancies – but then when I was born, she believed again. That's why they called me Mila – the meaning in Spanish is miracles – I'm their miracle baby after their losses. I went to church a few times with her after that, but I couldn't find the belief within myself, however, the values my mum held in things like be kind, love thy neighbour, and that sort of thing, I've always kept and believed in. 

I like the thought of believing in a higher power, but I just can't seem to believe in God in the natural sense. Angels, however, I've always thought might be real, but more in the after-you-die kind of thing.

Religion and belief have always made me stumble and confused. Many values are cemented in yourself when you're young, but this one thing I find is a forever changing thing. As a to-be princess, I have to be seen to believe in the Church of England, as I'll be a part of the family that's head of the church – I think that's how Kai described it. It's a strange phenomenon.

As my eyes adjust to my surroundings, my hearing kicks back in and a steady beep, beep, beep fills my ears, along with some distant talking.

"Peach?"

Kai's here. I can hear him, and after a second, he appears in my line of sight. His hair is dishevelled, he suddenly is wearing glasses, and he's shed his suit jacket.

He seems to be an angel right now. Maybe he always has been since our eyes met in the dark of the nightclub. Even then he seemed lighter than anyone else and has been since that night.

"Hi," I say, though my throat is sore and my voice hoarse. My eyes take in my surroundings. I'm in a hospital bed. The room is a fancy side room, and there's a massive window to my left that looks out over the greenery.

This isn't an NHS hospital, that's for sure.

"What happened? Last I remember, I fell down the stairs at the museum," I ask.

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