13: I've been WHAT?!

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Eli hale, it's been a month since I told Nat I'm Clark Kents doppelganger's son, since she told me she was the doppelganger's daughter of Lois lane, and her grounding is over now! It's been a peaceful month, other than the full moon, Nat had to sneak out and meet me in the caves, but it all went well, I didn't attack anyone, she wasn't caught sneaking out, everything was fine. I- I still don't have full control on myself, but I have a better grasp on I than I did at home, now that I have an anchor. The dreams have been going well, our theory was definitely correct, her scent helps me get to sleep and keeps me aware in dreams, I still have insomnia and can't sleep more than a couple days in a week, if I'm lucky, which I'm normally not.. But it's progress. The dreams have been great, sometimes it's the three of us, me, Dad and Tal, but it's not that bad, we're getting along well. But the off thing is that Clark Kent, superman hasn't returned home, and I can tell it's getting them a little anxious, but I overhear them talking and they aren't that worried about it.

It was night time and I was chilling in my bed, and I can tell that this is one of the off nights, when I won't get to sleep. "Well I'm still sleeping more than Not" I noted, I got out of bed and hid the hoodie of hers. I was half out of the wind-ow. "almost forgot" I chuckled, I grabbed my phone and texted lois, then chucked myself out of the window. "I fell on my arm wrong" I winced, I pulled myself up "eh I'll heal..." I said, or I should. my healing has been acting up since I've  got here. I realised that I've been talking longer to heal, like when I cut my hand doing the dishes, even for a beta that took a lot longer than normal, it should of been done in minutes, but I didn't really focus on that back then. "What's going on with me?" I asked, ever since I arrived here my chest has felt tighter, It feels harder to breathe the moment I woke up when I first arrived, I didn't dwell on it though, but recently, I have been, I think it's linked to my botched healing. I was in the barn, fiddling with my Lacrosse stick, waiting for my arm to heal, it definitely shouldn't be taking this long. "Why's this happening?" I asked, I should confide to Nat about this, I've only been questioning this for a week, but the more I think about it, the more I think I'm right. My arm had Finally healed and I was now playing, I do miss being in a Lacrosse team, I wonder how much time has passed in there, Beacon hills was already three years ahead, what if it's already been years since? Had they even bothered to look for me? I know Peter would, and at one point I would of thought Parish, Malia and Sheriff would, but since all of those insult meetings, I-I'm not sure anymore. Peter would of searched for me, but I hope he gave up, I don't want him having blind hope of me returning, I've never had that hope, and I still don't. "I do miss you Peter" I sighed, I miss the others too, but him the most, he never said anything bad about me. He's my only family left. I sometimes wonder what would happen if I get back home, or if I don't. If I'm still here, I like to think I'd still live on the farm, working so I can stay, me and Nat would still hang out but irregularly because she would be in college, same with the brothers, I have no Idea what I'm going to do so working on the farm it is, and I kind of prefer that.. but if I make it back to beacon, I don't know. Because I don't want to return there, everyone hates me there. listening to the pack insult me every night, hanging out with Peter in secret, it showed me that I didn't really mean anything to the pack, to barely anyone, but here... I think I mean something. If I went back, I'd be in the same situation, the pack hating me, even more so because of the hassle I caused, and hanging with Peter secretly. I can't think of what would happen if I went back, to beacon hills. If I could choose the ideal reality for me would be living in beacon with Peter, I'd be in high-school with Nat, I'd be the star Lacrosse player... I don't dare dream about dad in these thought processes, thinking like this hurts enough already.

Wack! Wack! Wack! Wack! "Whoa there werepuppy, you might break the net if you continue to go that hard" said Nat, I turned around, she was here, and the sun was out. "damn what time is it?" I asked, I walked over to her. "And hi" I added, I forgot how to talk to people for a moment. "hi, and it's Seven, couldn't sleep?" Guessed Nat, I put down My Lacrosse stick "ya, but you're trick still works" I said, I winked, Nat rolled her eyes "my paranoid little werepuppy" said Nat, she tried to drag me out, I didn't move "one, no my, and two, No little!" I wined, I have some standards. "Right, forgot paranoid puppy, now come on, Lois made muffins" said Nat, ooo muffins. Nat chuckled, I guess she could see what I thought on my face. we went on our way.

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