𝐀𝐂𝐈𝐃 : Hyunho

|| 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝟎𝟏

4th October 2007. Port Venston

"Let us close our study with a prayer. Dear God, we thank you for this beautiful time of learning and understanding your teachings. Help us to remember the lessons we have learned and guide us to share your love with others." I put my palms together.

There was silence in the church basement as the children finished their prayer. Some blinked through their eyelashes and jumped when I caught them. I had to stifle a smile. They're so cute.

The kids bowed with me and said Amen in unison. A warm smile spread across my face. "Well done, guys! Don't forget to take what you have learned into the week. See you-"

Before I could finish my sentence, half of the children had already broken out into a hectic frenzy. They packed their things and ran out of the room, their laughter trailing behind them.

"Next time..." A sigh escaped my lips. I couldn't blame them– the playground sounded much more appealing than the horribly painted room we were studying in. Thanks to the outdated, broken heating system, the air in here was stale and we were reaching 8o degrees at room temperature. The letters and drawings that adorned the room were older than me, and I remember feeling as dreadful to come here when I was their age as I did now.

"Mackenzie, what's wrong, honey?" I looked down at the little girl still sitting on my lap. She started playing with my cardigan and bouncing her feet. "Sam, can I ask you something?" "Always, you know that," I said, brushing a strand of her locks behind her ear.

Mackenzie resembled an angel. She had big blue eyes and long hair, and you never saw her looking anything less than a doll. But then, that was what you expected of the Major's daughter, wouldn't you? The leg she had been sitting on for the entire hour slowly lost all feeling and I was sure that if she did this every Saturday, they might as well amputate it. But one look at her face was enough to forgive her for the pain.

"If God sees everything... then why are there so many bad things on the earth?" The girl murmured, staring straight into my soul.

I knew I was the glue for the worldview they had taught her. God is above everything. And if you behave, Santa will give you a nice, big present. Not your rich parents shoving the silver spoon so far down your throat that you're afraid to ask questions. I can't tell her that God sprinkled some jerks in the world to make life more interesting. The smile on my face hardened, but I answered anyway.

"God created man to have a connection with Him. So we have to reject each other for an interaction to be real and not just an act. But when that proper opportunity arises, God shows his love for you, no matter how long you need to make the connection."

The longer I spoke, the more my lips felt fuzzy and dry as dust. If it wasn't for the kids in town, I never opened my mouth to talk for so long. I always chose the option with less drama and interaction. Agreeing with everyone around me limited the time I had to think of my own, just like the kids did. Apart from that, they didn't know any better.