The Iudex's day off

Chapter 61 - His pain

 "Congratulations, Monsieur Neuvillette."

 Voices upon voices.

 Words upon words.

 And finally...

 "Hello, Uncle Wriothesely!"

 How happy he had looked at the sudden way of address. A bit stunned, but happy nonetheless.

 The dragon inside him roared once again.

 Telling him that if he already knows that he was happy, he should return.

 But no.

 I can't.

 I won't.

 I can't take it!

 I can't even think straight at the thought of losing him.

 Not being able to see his smile anymore.

 Not hearing his voice again.

 "Ugh!"

 It hurt him.

 It pained him not only mentally, but physically as well.

 That pain...

 The paint that was the consequence of breaking an eternal promise.

 A promise Neuvillette hadn't even known he made.

 The pain of a dragon that abandoned his mate.

 Abandoned the one he had sworn to be with for the rest of his life.

 The only one.

 It hurt.

 It had been hurting for three days now.

 Pain so intense he wished he could die.

 That he could just vanish and dissolve.

 It felt like his whole being was being ripped to shreds and reassembled, only to be taken apart once again.

 His body.

 His mind.

 His soul.

 For the first time in his life, Neuvillette thought it would have been better if he was never born at all.

 He had never known the reason for his life.

 The truth behind his existence.

 And just when his life had found some meaning...

 No!

 Stop!

 Stop it already!

 Wriothesely's voice echoed inside his mind.

 "Neuv!"

 "Neuvillette!"

 "My dearest dragon!"

 Pictures of his smiles flashing before his eyes.

 "Pfft!"

 "Hahahaha!"

 Even if he closed them, even if he covered his ears...

 Please! Stop!

 I'm begging you!

 I'm begging...

 And suddenly, all seemed to fade.

 He opened his eyes.

 It was dark.

 All I could see was the dark and endless sea.

 I was still sinking and deep down I knew...

 Fonatine's waters weren't so deep.

 They weren't so dark.

 They weren't so utterly empty.

 They were full of light, full of life.

 I could feel my consciousness slowly fading.

 He could feel his consciousness fading.

 And yet, he still caught sight of it.

 I then caught sight of it.

 The beast lurking deep within the depths.

 The beast lurking deep within me.

 "It was you, wasn't it? You made the promise."

 But the dragon didn't answer.

 Slowly, it swam towards him, surrounding his sinking figure.

 "It must have been you. I would not have been so impulsive."

 The beast that lives within.

 One that acts not on conscious thought but rather pure subconscious instinct.

 It was a beast that Neuvillette had long learned to suppress.

 "And yet here you are... Why are you here, after all..."

 Still, the dragon didn't answer.

 "What would you do? You would want to return to him, wouldn't you?"

 To protect him. To make him happy.

 "You can't."

 Just stay.

 Stay locked in here with me.

 Locked away in the endless depths no one will ever find.

 Finally, the dragon roared.

 It was full of anger, full of pain.

 It was a broken cry.

 "I'm sorry..."

 Suddenly, the body that had curled itself around him disappeared.

 Neuvillette opened his eyes one last time to see its fading figure swim away.

 Somewhere deep down he knew that he shouldn't allow this.

 He knew that he could not allow the beast to surface.

 But it was too late.

 It was already so far...

 And Neuvillette...

 He had no more strength...

 His eyes finally closed, catching sight of the dragon one last time before even the sight of the dark waters entered his eyes no more.