The Devils Hair is White | Aonung

.46

"What?" I whisper, finally processing what Aonung just said.

"It's- it's all my fault," He stutters, stepping away from me.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"I asked Juxco to come with us, I saw him on his Ilu and told him to join us," Aonung nutters, facing away from me.

"Aonu-,"

"No it is my fault, you know it, I know it, soon everyone will know," Aonung faces me, tears in his eyes.

No

"Juxco is dead because of me Takara, you didn't do it, you saved so many Metkayina and Navi that I'll be responsible for one day and I got one of them killed," Aonung sucks in a harsh breath. "I got Juxco killed."

"Aonung you di-,"

"How am I going to take care of a whole village if I couldn't even keep one Navi alive, I'm not fit to be an- an Oley'ktan," Aonung stutters. "But that's all I'm suppose to be, I can't be anything els-."

I wrap my arms around his waist, burying my head in his chest as I hug him tightly. He stops talking, pausing for a second before wrapping his arms around me just as tightly.

"It's not your fault," I whisper as I listened to his heart beat hastily in his chest.

"If I never invited him to join us he wouldn't be dead," Aonung sniffles.

I suddenly feel so guilty. This entire time I've been saying how it's all my fault and avoiding Aonung and this is how he's felt.

"As Juxco lay dying he said 'don't cry at my funeral, don't wallow over my death, it is simply my time, no one could have known that nor prevented it'," I remind him, pulling my head off his chest to look at him. "Juxco doesn't blame anyone for his death."

"He should," A tear slips past his eyes as Aonung speaks.

"Aonung please, this isn't your fault," I cup his face in my hands.

"Ye- yes it is," He sighs, avoiding eye contact.

"Aonung stop it, it wasn't your fault, you could not have known what would happen to Juxco," I say firmly. "And I now realise that it wasn't my fault either and I can't blame myself."

"That because it isn't your fault," Aonung whispers. "It's mine."

"I've lost many Navi before and every time I've blamed myself, it doesn't help yourself heal at all," I say softly.

"What will help me heal?" Aonung asks.

"I distracted myself, pretend it never happened and live in denial, but I know that is not the right way," I shrug. "You need to cry, and talk about it, and let it all out, scream if you have to."

Aonung chuckles at my words, still refusing to look at me.

"But most importantly you need to not be alone, you need to have someone with you because you've just lost someone, don't force yourself to lose others," I advise.

Aonung finally looks at me, tears swelling in his eyes as his knees buckle and he collapses to the floor. I follow him immediately, crouching down in front of him as he wraps his arms around my waist and buries his face into my collarbone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ronal POV

Walking slowly back to my Mauri I keep a firm hand on my stomach. I'm 9 months along now and it feels like the baby will pop out at any second.