Just Strangers [SeongJoong]

022

Hongjoong 

I watched the whole stage from the doorway, not interested in sitting down. Mihi had asked me to come to watch and despite us not being as close as we were when we were kids, I decided to go. 

Which now...I was pretty happy I did. 

I was itching to beat the fuck out of someone and I finally had a reason to. 

"Hey Stacy!" Hana shouted as she walked on stage before me. It was clear she had her own target just as I had mine. I didn't miss the terrified look in Stacy's eyes and it made me chuckle as I walked past her. 

Hana would kill her. 

"Grab your girl." I said to Yunho and Mingi before they reached the dickhead. 

Mihi looked up at me with wide eyes and for some reason I just saw the same scared little girl with her face beaten bloody all over again, tears streaming down her cheeks as she just prayed for someone to help her. 

I smirked at her, winking as I walked past to the guy who did it to her. He towered over me and I could see the smug look on his face even though absolutely nobody was impressed. I gave no shits about foul play or some secret "guy code" as I kneed him in the balls so he'd fall to his knees and then I slammed my fist into his face. 

I felt....good for the first time in a very long time. 

I had so much anger built up inside my gut that I wasn't even focusing on my actions anymore, I just wanted to see more damage. I wanted somebody to be in pain because I was tired of it being me. 

I felt arms wrap around me and then I was being ripped off the college boy. 

I spun around to see who the fuck was grabbing onto me just to be welcomed by the prettiest face. Calm washed over me, wrapping around me like a soft hug and the feeling was so unsettling each and every time it happened. 

He looked to the side in alarm but I just couldn't take my eyes off of his face and then we were running. 

His fingers interlocked with mine and his grip was strong as he dragged me backstage and then out of an exit door. I had no idea where we were running but I didn't care as long as it was with Seonghwa. 

"Dramatic much?" I asked when he finally dropped my hand and we stopped running. 

I saw anger split over his angelic features only for a second until our eyes met and all of it was replaced with something else. 

Concern. 

He let out a long breath before he looked down and grabbed my hand in his as he inspected my knuckles. "Why do you always resort to violence?" 

"I only use violence if deserved. He deserved it." I answered simply, wanting to pull my hand out of his but his fingers were so soft and gentle I couldn't bring myself to. I hated myself for missing him so much but every time he was around...

"We've met before, haven't we?" He suddenly asked. "Before that day in the rain. When we were kids." 

My eyes widened, "You remember that?" 

His expression was a bit sad as he dropped my hand for the second time. "You were nice to me back then. You were the first person to ever treat me with kindness, of course I remembered that. I just didn't remember it being you until recently." 

I felt like I had been stripped bare and he was seeing me for the first time, underneath the veil I had put up for him. Before I went to college was something I liked keeping hidden. Only Mihi and San knew of me in those days and I liked it being that way. Whenever I realized Seonghwa clearly hadn't recognized me, I was more than glad. 

"I'm sorry for what I said to you, because it's not true. To say that people would give up on you because of your personality is a bunch of bullshit that came from my own buried insecurities. I see how people ignore you or overlook your pain, and I became one of those people. I don't want to be one of those people. I think you're really cool and one of the nicest people I've met even if you like to pretend you're not. So please...don't push me away anymore." 

I wasn't over anything he said because I wasn't sure I'd ever believe anything differently from the words he told me that day. But right now I just really didn't fucking care. I was tired of pretending like I wasn't human or that I didn't have feelings just because of something that was formed because of trauma. 

I knew I couldn't love, not really. Not in the way that was right and the way that was selfless. I was a very selfish human being and I knew that. When I did things to help others, it was because I wanted to, not because I desired to be a good person. I took things I wanted and right now I wanted Seonghwa. 

I wasn't sure how I hadn't hurt him yet and he kept saying it was because I was truly a good person or that I was kind but I wasn't sure that was true. 

"What if I get bored of you?" I blurted the words before I could think them through. It had been something that was always stuck in my head. 

He shook his head. "You don't get bored of people you really like, Hongjoong. If you did, you would've got rid of Mihi and San a long time ago. And if you do...then we'll cross that bridge when we get to it." 

I knew deep down I should care about me hurting him, I really should. 

But instead I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him forward as I snaked an arm around his waist so I could kiss him. 

I was obsessed with him.