Don't Let Me Drown

Eighteen: Confessions

Waking up in Chan's arms was the only place Hyunjin ever wanted to do it.

Light was streaming in through the gaps in the curtain, painting the two boys in soft light. It bounced off every edge and curve of them, fitting them together like a puzzle that was now complete. The younger boy blinked away his sleep and let his body relax into the one pressed against him. Home. This is what it was. This is where he belonged.

It almost felt like dreaming, remnants of sleep rolling off him as he let himself lie there and take in the leader wrapped around him. His face was serene, still in slumber and gently illuminated by the new day. Dark curls lay unruly across his forehead and it took every inch of self control to not reach out and brush them with delicate fingers.

The only movement between them was the slow rise and fall of their chests, matched in breathing and staying steady. It released a calm, a warmth, a longing. Hyunjin could feel them pressing together as he took each breath and the rhythm lulled him into a peace that he hadn't felt in so long. Everything was perfect.

His eyes lazily traced the contours of the sleeping boy's face, memorising every single detail and committing it to memory like the masterpiece Chan was. It was such a quiet beauty, a vulnerability in sleep, a cleverly unguarded authenticity that had the older boy presented to him as an ethereal statue. A work of art. Every single inch of him was enchanting and it swelled in Hyunjin's heart.

The way Chan's eyelashes curved along his cheekbones, soft lips rising and falling too with each breath whilst he stayed in his content slumber. Small movements, the crinkling of the older boy's nose as he went through his dreams, each one etched into Hyunjin's memory where it would never leave him again.

He refused to disturb the scene, lying there as he painted the leader in his mind and poured all the tranquillity and affection onto each stroke. The taller boy was smiling to himself now, obsessed with the boy that held him and thankful for the moment of silence in his head. He held onto the simplicity of it, letting himself be pulled under by the profound beauty he was observing.

Chan stirred, like he could sense Hyunjin was awake now, and his eyes fluttered open. A welcome smile formed on his face and the younger boy wanted nothing more than to connect their mouths together and share it with him. The world was on pause, nothing else outside mattered.

"Good morning," Chan's voice was a whisper, laced with sleep and melodic. Hyunjin wanted to hear the gravelly tone every day for the rest of his life.

"Morning," a simple response, matched in tone. The taller boy leaned in, kissing his friend softly but almost embarrassed to do so. He didn't know what he was supposed to do now but this felt natural, like it was the right answer.

Lips lingered at the silent exchange, stealing more kisses, each one more gentle than the last. Their embrace tightened as hands pressed bodies together and palms explored skin. Every path they took was familiar, the contact searing them but Hyunjin found the connection he needed and followed it. It was more intimate than the proximity they shared, he was pushing their souls together.

Together they stayed like that for longer than they cared to think, taking in each other's beauty and translating it to the touches they shared. Their words were stolen by desire, heavy breaths taking over the silence as long fingers knotted into curls and strong hands kneaded into slim hips and thighs. They needed each other, they wanted each other.

Any fabric they were wearing was discarded, hitting the floor in a soft thud as needy moans replaced any sense of quiet. Hyunjin was grinding against Chan, sensitive whines hanging in the air as he let the leader take control and wrap his hand around their dicks, the contact forcing the younger boy's back into his head and his mouth to hang open.