the boy next door

Saying goodbye

Chapter thirty three:

Francesca was such a beautiful baby. Over the next few days we had so many visitors, including our mothers, cooing over little Frankie. Everybody who met her fell in love with her, as Liam says " that's what happens when two beautiful people do the deed." that is such a Frankie saying. She is not forgotten. Its her funeral tomorrow. Frankie ( my best friend) is having a joint funeral with Sam. It has been guaranteed there will be lots of sparkle and cacti. It will be hard to say goodbye, but it will be nice to celebrate their lives I guess. Today I was going to see jack for the first time since the accident. He had to have plastic surgery and is in a wheelchair for now, if he does his classes, he should hopefully be able to walk again. Part of his cheek has had to be surgically reconstructed. I know jack cares about his looks so I hope the damage isn't to bad. I can walk again even though it hurts a he'll of a lot.

I walked into his room. He smiled at me, jack looked exactly the same, it's amazing what these surgeons can do. I went in, he said to me " hey lot, how's the baby. I've been kept in the dark. Mostly because I've been drugged up and as high as I kite, but, yes. I'm guessing I have a little nephew?" Liam walked in then, Liam gave him a dodgy man hug, then I hugged jack saying " you have a niece jack." Liam interjected " uncle jack." then jack poked him saying " daddy, pass me some choclit!" that was an on going joke between me Liam Frankie and jack. Liam handed him a bar of dairy milk. I then said " the baby is called Francesca Samantha James" jack smiled then said " why them names?" shit he really didn't know anything. This would be difficult. Very difficult to watch my brother be destroyed. I said " jack-" I began crying, Liam grabbed my hand across the bed then said " jack, Sam. Sam is gone." jack started laughing. He then saw we were deadly serious and his face fell " no way? Seriously? What did he do?" this was all a big joke to him. " he died saving your life!!" I shouted. Jack then said " jeez lot! Honestly how did he die?" Liam sighed then said " well we were all in that crash and Molly turned up with a gun. She tried to shoot you, but Sam stopped her." jack then said " I owe that dude my life." I nodded.

Liam then said " and, Frankie." there are no words to describe the look on jacks face. " Frankie died?" I nodded sadly. Liam cleared his throat then said " lottie was in labour, Molly pulled the gun on her, and Frankie took the bullet." jack shouted, pointing at me " you bitch! You let her die?" a tear rolled down his cheek. Liam said " it wasn't Lotties fault jack." jack said" I never even told her I loved her." I felt so bad. " it's your fault. It's your fault she's dead lottie! And you Liam, I thought you were supposed to be a good driver?" enough with the personal attacks. I know he was upset but liam wasn't to blame. I was. " I know it's my fault jack, but I didn't ask her to. I didn't know she was going to. She died in my arms jack. It was horrible. I'm just gonna go." I stood up, walking off to find Francesca. I heard Liam say to jack " real smooth jack." then I heard his crutches coming after me.

" lottie, despite what you think, it wasn't your fault they died. It was Molly. And she's dead. Honestly. Jack is just upset." he hugged me from behind. I love it when he does that. I turned round kissing him saying " I suppose." he said " let's go home. You go get Frankie and I'll call a taxi." I was about to ask why couldn't he drive, but then I remembered his leg, and the fact we didn't have a car, it was a total write off. Shit, we would have to find Money somewhere for a new car if insurance didn't pay out. I went and got Frankie, signing all the necessary papers. then, we left the hospital, now it all begins.

Considering Francesca was a month premature, she was a good weight and quite healthy. She also was quite quiet compared to all the other babies, unlike Frankie. Mum was coming home to watch Frankie while me and Liam went to the funeral. Jack want fit to go, and he was very upset about it. We went home, and on the wall of Francescas room, her name was put in. It was really sweet, mum must have done it. That night, Frankie woke up once. Only once. That is unheard of for a newborn. I had a feeling me and my daughter would get on well.

THE FUNERAL:

I walked into the church. It was deadly silent. I was holding liams hand for support. I looked around. I spotted sams friends from Louis spence dance camp straight away. They were were all patting each other on the back, blowing kisses and everything. Frankie's parents were here too, and rocco her brother. They had come back from Australia to say goodbye. It was really sad. I went to sit on the front row because I was making a speech about my two best friends. Isa was sitting near by. She was crying, I had never seen Isa cry, Mollie was next to her, sobbing as well. Heather was comforting her. She wasn't crying but looked close to tears. Edward and mike and danny were also here. It was so nice to see the church full of friends and family. There was one person missing. Justin. He just disappeared off the face of the earth. I think he may have committed suicide or gone back to Mexico. Which ever, he is not answering the phone. He has done a mel and upped and left.

At the front, the coffins were there. Sams was sparky pink, surrounded by beautiful flowers and hundreds of cacti. Ones with sombreros on, ones with leotards on, ones with Santa hats on. Sam would love this. Frankies was red, her favourite colour, it too had beautiful flowers on, as well as lots of pictures, ones of mr.bean, ones of meerkats, ones with Madagascar on. This was so personal to them, it was beautifully done, it really pulled on the heart strings. The service was wonderful as well, the songs were from musicals, wicked ( frankies favourite) and cats ( sams favourite, mainly because of Louis spence) the one song that really got me was my heart will go on and on from the titanic, me Sam and Frankie used to stand on the firework in year seven, acting it out. I wouldn't be able to do that anymore. It was time for my speeches.

As I walked up to the lectern I was shaking, Liam smiled at me in support. I began, holding back the tears. " I'm sure all of you here have at least one memory of Sam. Sam was so full of life, he was funny, he was lively, and he was entertaining. He was proud to be gay and wasn't afraid to show his affection towards my brother, and later Justin." everyone laughed. " I suppose, the one thing that sticks out as a particular memory of Sam was in year eight, we were eating lunch, and this boy called Damien drew accidentally knocked Sam, making his jam sandwiches stick to his new Louis spence cats jumper. He adored the jumper and he definitely made Damien pay for his mistake. Sam was so mad he made Damien face plant the chocolate cake he had just bought. Sam had started this huge food fight, and when mr.McKay came in and ask what had happened, everyone pointed to Sam, and he said " it wasnt me, it was Damien! He wrecked my new jumper. " mr. McKay was not impressed and Sam managed to get out of trouble and got damien to pay for his dry cleaning bill. I could stand here and talk about Sam all day, but I'm not going to, I'm going to keep it short and sweet like him." I got a round of applause. Next was Frankie.

" Frankie. What can I say about Frankie, she was truly amazing, sue was a brilliant singer, dancer actor. She had so much going for her, and she gave it all up for me. She was funny, intelligent and kind, she was my stylist, my agony aunt and my match maker, she knew all my secrets and kept them to herself. Like Sam, we all have special memories with Frankie. My best one has to be..." I didnt know how to finish that sentence. Because then I would have to acknowledge the fact she was gone, I took a deep breath then continued " there are to many. Like all those times with mr.south and Frankie hiding under the table, and irritating him in re and geography. All those time she argued with the science teacher, moaning about plant DNA. The laughs we shared when mr,miller and mrs brown used to trip over the bags, or when mrs rippon fell in the bin. There was also the Saturday's we spent singing high school musical songs, rocking out on her wii when home alone. The time we made up the song about twilight breaking Dawn part two after aros pedophile laugh. There are to mny good times to narrow it down. Frankie, I will miss you. I will miss our trips round town stalking people. Our McDonald s breakfasts, our gossips. Our moans, our groans, all those good times. Thankyou for being my best friend. There will be a hole in my heart now your gone. I took my seat, saying goodbye to my best friends. All that's left are memories, and that's all they are. There will be no more because there's no more Sam. Or Frankie. Goodbye... That's the hardest word to say.... Goodbye.