the boy next door

Moving on

Chapter twenty one:

We went back to school, I had p.e next, but I really shouldn't be taking part so I sat texting on my phone. Jack and Liam were in RE jack text me saying " so what's this good news then?" I replied " has Liam not told you?" " no, he said you would" thanks Liam. This would probably destroy him. We were so close. I text " Caroline and Dave have given us there house. Were gonna do it up 4 the baby. Sorry xx " jack didn't reply for a few minutes. Then I got a " that's cool. I'm happy 4 u guys. I have something to tell you guys too." I was sitting there thinking a whole range of things. Has he got a girl friend? Is he dying? Is he moving away? Has he got a girl preggers? I got no reply so kept texting constantly saying what. No reply. Mrs rippony must have confiscated his phone.

At break, I was sitting in our form room chatting to Frankie about her date with Danny when jack and Liam came in. Everyone went silent as jack said " alright Frankie? Um lot, can I borrow you a minute?" Frankie blushed as I stood up taking liam's hand. We walked out into the corridor as jack said " sorry lot, bloody teacher took ma phone." I could help but giggle at that. Then he said " I'm very pleased you guys are getting your house, you ready for my news?" I nodded as did Liam " I have been offered a place at Glasgow uni!!! To study sports and business studies. I'm really excited and now you two are sorted I can go can't I lot?" I smiled weakly then rushed off to the girls toilets.

Glasgow? That's in Scotland. It's really far away. I wanted jack to be part of my child's life. My baby will probably never get to see uncle jack now. I was being selfish though. This is an amazing opportunity for jack. What about mum and the house? There's no point having it if no one is living in it. I have so many memories there. Bad and good. All the house parties, film nights, kisses, my first kiss. Losing my virginity, I know it's just a house but, well it feels like getting rid of that is getting rid of my past, must be the baby hormones. I began to tidy up my mascara when someone walked in. It was Liam. He hugged me then said " babe, you alright? Listen, we can talk to jack later the bell has gone just wanted to check you were ok." I reached up and kissed him, his hands ran down my back resting on my bum. When his lips left mine I smiled and he walked off out of the girls loos. I heard the door go again, I thought Liam had come back when I heard Heather come in.

" hello Charlotte" she said the conversation continued like this. " Heather" I said. She said " do you know what Charlotte? At first I felt bad for you, being sloppy seconds and all, I also felt bad because Liam just doesn't love you the way he loves me... I mean, the other afternoon was just.... Wow! Mind blowing. The only reason he's with you is because of that." she said looking down at my non existent bump. I was filled with rage and sadness at the same time, was Liam cheating on me? He was off sick on Tuesday afternoon and Heather wasn't in French. If she was trying to get at me it was working. " Heather, I doubt he would, because I mean, if he dumped you, you can't have been very good at all can you?" her mouth hung open in shock. Osh, burn!!! She said " lottie, listen, a boy like Liam has needs. Needs your not meeting clearly. I mean, just look at you. Your hair looks like rat tails and your eyes are dull. Your lips, let's pass on them and your body? Well, your boobs are getting bigger, and your getting curvier..... And maybe a little fat. He's not gonna want you much longer is he?" her insults were stinging. she was right, he wasn't going to want me much longer. Maybe I should dump him? Save myself the pain. But I needed Liam in my life so much, why did I trust him? I didn't say anything and Heather said " yea. I know. It hurts doesn't it? I've been where you are. It was Danny though. Silly boy.... I got my little problem sorted though. I back for my Liam now, jack just isn't up to scratch. Let me give liam what he needs and you, you just sort out your little problem then go back to being the little quiet girl. No one likes this new you. Haven't you noticed? Frankie isn't around as much is she? Molly realised what your like and got some REAL friends, and as for Mollie and sam. Well need I go on?" she was right. My life was falling apart. I couldn't let her see me cry though. Then she would know how upset I was, it would show weakness. She smiled at me then patted my shoulder saying " good luck lottie!" bitch.

I decided to cut class. This really wasn't good. I kept missing class, but I couldn't face them. I text Frankie saying I wasnt feeling well. Then I switched off my phone and began the 35 minute walk home. when I got home I crawled into my bed locking the door behind me. At four o clock the front door slammed shut and I heard two sets of heavy foot prints coming up the stairs. It was jack and liam. Jack started " lottie, you in there? You ok?" I shouted " go away I'm fine." I could hear them whispering then jack said " lot, open the door. Are you sure your ok? If you don't want me to go to Glasgow I won't go." I couldn't have him not going because of me. " no jack, I want you to go." I said. Then jack said " well what's wrong then?" he was getting irritated but was trying not to show it. I could tell. " don't worry jack, I'll be down in an hour or so, I'm just,.....really tired" then i heard jack stomp downstairs defeated.

I was thinking about what Heather said about Liam cheating on me earlier, that was why I was upset, and my friends, they had been a little more distant than usual. Frankie always invites herself round like any best friend would, but not recently. Just then two strong arms curled around me. It was Liam. He had climbed through the window. I was going to cry, I knew it. " get off me Liam" I said firmly, trying to hold it together. He didn't. He said " lottie, what's wrong tell me, you can tell me anything you know, I won't ever judge you. I love you." I felt a tear spill out of my eye as I sat up looking at him. I hated hurting him, but i had to do this, " yes, but do you Liam?" he looked at me and said quickly without hesitation " princess, I do love you, more than anything. There will only ever be one other girl in my life but you. And she will be calling you mummy." that was sweet. " you got that off Facebook didn't you?" he nodded as i said " Liam, telling someone you love them, it just isn't enough. You have to mean it. How many other Slags have you said that too? Touched them the way you touched me?" " lottie, all them girls, they were to try and forget you. They meant nothing to me, I swear!" he did look honest. Why should I believe this though? He may be bull shitting. " Liam. I love you honestly I do. But I don't think were gonna work out, you and me. It's ridiculous we can't be parents!" his eyes went dark and clouded over. He said " lottie,if that's the way you feel I can't change that, but I will spend every day of the rest of my life loving you." I felt something inside me snap. I was having a melt down. I was crying uncontrollably. Liam didnt try and comfort me. He said " why the sudden change though? Earlier we were fine. I thought we still were?" " Heather Liam." he looked guilty. It was true he cheated on me!!! " where were you on Tuesday Liam? Tell me honestly, where were you????"