poems/qoutes/thoughts

I'm not fat but

I'm not fat but
My belly sticks out
And it surrounds the front
Of the pants
As I sit down

I tuck it in
I hide it
To keep the rolls
From showing
For if I didn't
Everyone would know
What was worth knowing

I'm not fat but
If I showed you the inside
The outside wouldn't matter
You would walk away
In disappoint
No longer flattered

And if you touched
My love handles
Are they a cure
Or a curse?
For do they make
You fall in love?
Or fall for the worse?

I'm not fat
I'm not

My legs are skinny
My thighs slightly too
It's just the belly fat

It's the truth

Something
I can't erase
Can't escape
Can't look down
Without seeing
It's ugly face

But

I'm not fat

Or am I?

Is it a trick?
An illusion?
A coy for my demise?

Do I suffer in the pain
Just so tears can feel my eyes?
Or do I sit there and accept it?

Tell me
Tell me now
Tell me how

If you brushed your finger
Against my stretch marks
And felt my cold
Belly hanging out

Would you love what you fell for?
Or would I surround you with doubt?

I'm not fat but
When I look
In the mirror
Something tells
Me I am

And I start to
Believe it

I start to believe

That I am the monster

Yes, maybe I am.