Smiles Of The Heart (ON HOLD)

Chapter eleven

(How are you so early? And even if you are, couldn't you knock and step inside?)

"Sorry. Mujhe laga yeh mera bhi room hai. Agli baar yaad rakhunga." He said sarcastically and she looked embarrassed.

(I thought this is my room as well. I'll remember next time.)

She huffed and grumbled something under her breath which he ignored and walked up to the bed, dropping his laptop bag. He noticed her ignoring him as well as she kept her attention in scrolling through her phone. When some time later he walked out of the bathroom after freshening up, she was still busy in her phone which annoyed him.

"Are we really going to play this game?" He asked in a clipped tone.

She looked up and stared at him with a blank face. He knew she was acting dumb to avoid the topic but he had enough. They couldn't go on forever avoiding the talk.

Avika looked away, "I don't know what you are talking about." She mumbled more like to herself and Kiaan clenched his jaw.

He stalked towards her and stood in front of her, making sure she wouldn't escape. "Is this about your mother rejecting to stay here?" He asked and she looked at him pissed. "Stop calling her my mother as if she isn't something to you!" She gritted and he scoffed.

"Don't make this about me. You have been behaving different from the moment she refused to stay with us. Tell me, is it my fault that she refused?" He was barely controlling his anger yet his tone was sharp.

Avika stood up; her eyes furious. "When did I say that it is your fault? She sneered back.

His eyes narrowed, "Your behaviour sure displays that. You are punishing me like I convinced mom to say no to this arrangement." 

"What are you even saying? When did I punish you?" She nearly yelled, eyes brimming with frustrated tears and his heart clenched.

He didn't want to make her cry but if he didn't say this now, he knew it would be too late and maybe they could never repair their relationship.

"Everyday. You are punishing me every single day." He rasped, hurt laced in his voice.

"You don't look at me. I don't see your smile. I barely hear your voice. I barely see you. Being under the same roof, I can barely catch a glimpse of you. We stay in the same room but you leave the room before I wake up and return at night only after I fall asleep. You don't talk to me. You don't share what goes on inside you and it kills me." He croaked, feeling terrible seeing her tears running without a stop yet he made no move to wipe them off.

Something heavy settled on his heart and weighed him down. He gulped the lump lodged in his throat and whispered in a vulnerable tone, "You don't even give me my hugs."

•ᴗ•

The moment he whispered about the hugs, a sob broke out from her chest and she covered her mouth with her palm.

"I don't want to be the only one trying in this relationship, Avika. Main yeh akele nahi kar sakta. Aisa lagta hai ki humne jaha se shuru kiya tha wahi aakar wapis khade hogaye hai." He chuckled humourlessly and she could see the pain in his eyes. She hated being the reason behind it and more than that she hated herself for hurting the only person who had been nothing but understanding towards her.

(I can't do this alone. I feel like we're back to square one.)

"Why can't you share your thoughts with me?" Sadness clouded his features and before she could say anything he turned around abruptly and left the room leaving her in guilt.