Dare You To Love Me

«8» thoughts of you

Not talking about her betrothed meant she could pretend she wasn't being forced into a marriage, even though Abbad's presence in her life said otherwise. Still, it was easier to pretend than acknowledge the big elephant in the room whenever they were together.

Now, as the wedding loomed ever closer, she decided it was high time to acknowledge the invisible string that tethered her and Abbad together.

“Yes.”

“And?” she queried, biting her lower lip, even though a part of her didn't really care to know what he thought about their wedding invitation being printed without either of their consents, or was it just her consent that hadn't been needed?

“Yaseerah...”

“What were his thoughts on the invitation, Abbad?” she questioned with a long-suffering sigh. “Don't I deserve to at least know that?”

Her lips wobbled, tears threatening to spill out of her eyes, but she swallowed past the thick lump in her throat, and listened as he inhaled a sharp breath before answering her question.

“You deserve a whole lot more than that, Yaseerah,” he sighed, clearing his throat, as if he was gearing up for saying something that he wasn't comfortable with. “Fouad designed the invitations.”

Of course, she scoffed inwardly. But, what did it say about her fiancé, if he never bothered to contact her yet had the time to design their wedding invitation?

“Huh.”

“It isn't what you think it is, I assure you, but..."

“Don't defend him," she cut him off, frustration rising. “You've been doing that since the beginning. I didn't care then, but now... I don't think I can do this.”

She released a long breath then, feeling the truth of her words resonate within her.

She knew she loved Abbad, his family too. But they weren't truly her family, and if Fou'ad rejected her after the wedding... Well, she knew whose side they'd be on.

The fact that he had gone to great lengths to ensure that they'd never met, even at social functions where both families were to be present, said everything about his stance on the marriage.

Couldn't she hope he'd at least acknowledge their forced union? Or show some concern for her feelings?

Or that he would even give her a piece of his mind so that she would know she wasn't the only person going through this circle of hurt and disappointment?

Was it too much to wish that he had taken her thoughts and feelings into account? That he had at least contacted her even once, just to let her know that she wasn't alone in this?

Was she that inconsequential to him?

“Are you listening to me?” Abbad's voice brought her back to reality.

And it was then that she noticed the blood dripping from her palm onto the white plains of her windowsill, and the bite of pain from the cut.

“You made me a promise that first night,” she uttered, not bothering to reply to him or feel guilty about spacing out while they were conversing. “I hope that you will keep it.”

Without waiting for his reply, she hung up the call and let her phone fall onto the rug.

•—۵—•

Home spa session at Hayat Farraj's house was the last thing on Yaseerah's mind, not after the conversation with Abbad just moments ago.