Him - SKZ ⛓️🥀

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Before I start...
There was a comment on why I let Felix die so often in my stories and not let him fight his demons or let his hyungs help him to get better, but I think that's just my writing style. I also know from my own experience how difficult it is to fight/handle your anxieties and/or depression in order to get 'better' again. Unfortunately I can't write much about this process of getting 'better' because I never found a way to be 'better'.
I just learned to live with it.

Authors are very often guided by their own experiences and feelings when writing and that's how it is for me too. That's why you'll find a lot of angst in this book.

I'm sorry if this triggers you in any way or if you don't like it, but I'll be honest... you don't have to read my stories, if it bothers you. I don't want to sound mean and I also won't be mad or anything like that.

I hope I was able to clarify the situation somewhat. Also, major spoiler for this one...
Major character death and Plot Twist!

Anyways, I hope you still enjoy this story!

=

Felix lost himself during the last few days and no one noticed. The problem is something dark took notice of Felix feelings and took over the pure boy.

*****

Felix felt tired. So very tired. The last few weeks were exhausting for all of them, as always, but this time it was extra eshausting and tyring for Felix.
Soemthing just didn't felt right with Felix and he knew he needs to talk with someone, so he tried to do that.
Chan was the first one he came up with. Chan promised him at his elimination day, that the he would always be there for him and Felix could always come to him. But when he needed Chan the most, Chan just waved him off.

"Channie-hyung can we talk?", Felix said and he walked into Chans studio.
"Huh? Oh, it's you. I am sorry Lixie, but I am quite busy right now. Can it wait?", Chan asks still focusing on his laptop and not sparing a single glance at his aussie bro. Because if the older one would have taken a better look at Felix, he would have noticed that something was wrong with his little angel. Felix was thinner, had big and dark circles around his eyes and heavy eye backs.
Felix noticed the chaos in Chans studio, so he just noded sadly.
"Of course hyung. There will still be time for that later", he says and closes the door again without saying goodbye, but Chan didn't even seem to care.

'They don't care about you.

Chan abondend you a long time ago.

You are not important for him anymore.

You are just an instrument he uses for his music.

You are nothing...'

Felix tried to ignore the voice, but Felix felt like they were right. Chan didn't cuddled with him as much as he used to. Chan stopped lying in his bed when he came home late. He didn't thanked him anymore, when Felix brought him food. Felix just didn't exist for Chan anymore.
Felix knows that his leader has a lot of burdens and wants the best for the team, but is there really so little time for some Lixie-time left?
Felix got frustrated and tried the next member.
Minho Hyung.
Minho was like an older brother for him. They had the same fate, but they both got a second chance and both of them wants to use them as best as they can. But Felix struggles right know and he needs his hyung and his motivation speach. Just like he did back then...

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