Let my fires protect you || Kaz Brekker X Reader

15. His Phoenix

"Kaz let you in on it?"

"You were asleep when he meant to tell us both. He didn't want to wake you." I blushed slightly and was touched by his consideration. I shook my head off the fought and that's when I saw someone firing down the masts of the actual Ferolind, Jesper, hopefully. This was good that meant Jesper had made it and now we have to give the others time. "You go right near the Ferolind, try and make it and hold them off." She tries to object but I stop her, "I'll go left and hold the rest of them off." She doesn't object and we seperate, I do something I barely do and pray for her, pray to all the saints that she will be safe. 

I start running to the left while keeping my hand out my way so I don't hurt it anymore, this proved to already be a bit of a struggle. I climbed on top of a crate above two people, I got my knife ready and hopped down, I slit one of their throats and stabbed the other in between his ribs. I checked for their tattoo and saw the tattoo of the Black Tips. That made absolutely no sense, they don't have the money to pull off something like this. I went further and killed another two men, who were Razorgulls. How many gangs were we up against? The next corner I was going in blind. Should I climb up and risk my position or go and see who I was facing which could be even worse? I thought of the odds that I had to put more into our favour and I took the risk. These people will die and the Dregs will survive. I went into a lunge and turned the corner, luck was in my favour and there were two men with guns facing away from me. I got my good arm and sent two seperate blasts of flame that way which swallowed them whole. 

Hopefully the odds were evened out by both Inej and I. Hopefully she and the rest of them were safe. Now it was time to get back to the schooner and set off on this damned mission. Hopefully I can put my hand in the ocean and stop the searing pain that I still felt. I turned round to the crates and saw the ugly face of Oomen smiling, then a blade went into my abdomen. 

He yanked me forward and twisted the knife further in. "Ghezen! I've got Brekker's phoenix."

"No, you don't. You should've aimed higher, missed my heart."

"Don't want you dead, Phoenix. We know you have the same information as the Wraith on Brekker and everyone else. Perhaps more on Brekker, himself. I do love a good story." I spat in his face, "I can tell you how this one ends." I smile, "But you're not gonna like it."

"That so?" He slammed me up against the crate the knife pinning me to it too, I felt drained, the pain was becoming too much and I wanted to just go to sleep again, maybe this time I don't have to wake up. No, I couldn't do that, I was needed, I was necessary. I need to fight this and help the dregs, then maybe I can die later. "Do you know the secret to fighting a scorpion?"

He laughed, and it reminded me of the men in the Menagerie so much that I winced, "Talking nonsense. Don't die too quick, we need to get you patched up." I crossed one ankle behind the other and heard a reassuring click. This was something Inej told me I had to have, pads in the knees for climbing and crawling but also to hide tiny steel  blades inside. "The secret, is to never take your hands off the scorpions tail." I brought up my knee and jammed the blade in between his legs. He shrieked and released me, pulling the blade out, dropping it and throwing his hands toward his bleeding groin. 

I staggered down the row of crates and started climbing with just my one arm and apparently good enough flexibility to swing my legs up each one. I could hear men shouting at eachother and guns firing, who was winning? I hope the others had made it to the schooner. I felt my head drop and my world started to spin. I suppose I had proven the world wrong, If I die right now, I can't be the prodigy of a vengeful god, this was not the end that such a thing should have. I was a gutter rat, nothing, a girl with a gift as Kaz put it so long ago.  

The thought of Kaz made me go on a little further, get a little higher. Every time I get higher I remember a memory; Meeting Inej, meeting Kaz and Jesper, protecting Jesper from those men, getting us across the fold, getting the goat with Kaz (that one made me smile a little as I lifted myself further), doing the dance that Kesh taught me, saving Kaz from the Inferni, when I apparently presented myself as this prodigy, meeting Nina. Every memory of the people I love got me higher, kept me going. 

I heard laughter from below which interrupted my life flashing before my eyes, Oomen. "Come out, come out Phoenix! We have secrets to tell!" I'd rather bite off my tongue. I reached for the next crate but I missed and was now left there, dangling. "Fly down, Phoenix!"

"Eat shit!" He laughed and I tried to get up again but everything hurt so much. My guts were spilling out, my hand was charred remains. What if I did let go? No,I heard Kaz's voice in my head, Keep going, we need your flame to burn down the Ice court. This time it was Inej. I fought to get up with everything I had but failed, "I can't, I've failed you. I'm so sorry." I hated that I would dissapoint the boy who I felt like I had to prove myself too no matter how much of an asshole he was, the bestfriend that I would protect with everything I had, I would fail Nina too, I will never be able to bring her sugary treats again, I'd fail Jesper, I'd never drink with him again. I would never get to know Wylan or Matthias, Wylan seemed kind and Matthias seemed honourable despite his racism. 

This is a stupid place to die, especially for me, if the legend was true. I suppose there were worst places. I could have died of starvation or illness as a child, or as a whore swathed in silks and paint. But I die as free as a bird, with a knife in my hand and fire in my veins. 

A hand seized my ankle. They climbed the crates? How could I not have heard them? I slid a blade from my sleeve into my charred hand which I forced myself to close. It was kinder to have the mercy of a quick death where I'd see my mother again than be tortured by these assholes. 

I pointed it in between my ribs above my heart, "I'll miss you." A final message to the Dregs. A hand twisted my wrist which caused even more pain and I dropped the blade. "I'm touched but not yet, Phoenix." Life flew back into my eyes and my entire being, the fire raged. Kaz, he came for me. 

He bundled me into his arms and I bumped against his chest, he dropped down. He's holding me, he didn't use his cane. Oh, Kaz, "How the hell are you doing this?" 

"I have no idea." 

"Did we win?"

"I'm here, aren't I?" He is, we won, we fucking won. I felt at peace, maybe I didn't fail them entirely. He must be running. My body jounced painfully against his chest. He needs his cane. Why is he doing this? "I don't want to leave you."

"I'll do my best to make other arrangements for you." I wanted to laugh but it hurt so much. I closed my eyes, I was safe with Kaz, I could sleep for a little. "Keep talking, Phoenix. Don't slip away from me."

"But it's what I'm good at, Inej is better though." He laughed a little and I smiled, if I was to die right now, I'd die happy that I could make him smile. He clutched  me tighter and I hated that he had to fight his fear for this, "Just make it to the schooner, open your damn eyes, (Y/n)." I forced them open, I needed to keep them open. Kaz was fighting for me, I had to fight for him. My vision was blurring but I could make him out, I believe I could with my vision gone. 

"You came back for me."

"I protect my investments." He just called me an investment? "I thought our friendship meant something to you."

I didn't hear his reply. The darkness took me for his own, I'd fight him if he wouldn't let me return to the person I would protect with my life. I'd burn to return to him.