Entitled . HS

EIGHTEEN.

It was 5:23 pm on Saturday night. Yesterday, I cleaned out the fridge and sent Levi grocery shopping to restock. Then, I cleaned the bathroom because boys are gross and they turn into men who are equally gross when they pee all over the floor. So far today I cleaned the room I shared with Dillon, which led to me emptying and reorganizing my dresser and closet. In doing so, I unearthed some books that I bought with every intention of reading, but had never gotten to. I was saving those for tonight when I inevitably couldn't sleep.

Basically, I was trying to keep myself distracted. I read through one book and got bored. I'd already turned in all my work for the semester, since it ended next week, and I had nothing to do for work at Sinclair. I had no idea how distracting trying to NOT think about having sex with someone could be. I couldn't look at the bra he ran his fingers underneath because then I had to change my underwear. Who the hell was I and what had Harris Sinclair done to me?

- Atty: I need a drink

- Atty: or ten

- Atty: actually I needed to start drinking two hours ago

- Benji: I'm on at the bar tonight

- Benji: come by and you can stay

- Atty: I need to come home and sleep but I need a distraction i'll come and drink for a few hours

- Benji: you might get to meet Derek

- Atty: fuck now I have to get all cute

- Benji: No you don't. He's seen a bunch of pictures of you and knows all about us

- Atty: maybe i'll stay home and drink instead

- Benji: don't you dare

- Benji: can Levi drive you?

- Atty: I think so because he's getting ready to go out

- Benji: Alright then Derek can drive you home

- Atty: you annoy me

- Benji: and you love it

He wasn't wrong. I did love it and I was actually excited to meet Derek in the flesh. That meant that I had to get a little spiffed up, so I sorted through my newly organized closet to find just the right outfit and did a little more makeup than usual, though I don't know why. I hated it when people tried extra hard to be something they weren't and yet here I was, curling my eyelashes (which I did a total of ten days per year).

I decided to text Harris, just to make sure I wasn't going to have a run in with him at Lavender Lake. I was not in the right headspace to reject him, but I needed to prove to myself that I could stay away all weekend. That man was like a drug and I didn't like anyone having that kind of control over me.

- Atty: how was the studio?

- Harris: Still there

- Harris: got a late start so I'll be here a while

- Harris: want to come join me 😏

- Atty: no I'm going to meet Benji's new guy

- Atty: i wanted to tell you stay away

- Harris: now I might have to finish up early

Why did I even tell him why I was texting? I was such an amateur when it came to him. All my common sense went right out the window with my clothes anytime we were in the same room. Now apparently it was going out the window with him anytime we texted. With anyone else, this would have been about the time that I broke everything off and ran the other direction, but I couldn't do that with Harris when I had to work with him every day and the worst part was that I didn't want to.