Loving Lord Bridgerton

Chapter Twenty-One

The moon was high in the sky and the room was filled with with the soft sounds of Anthony sleeping. I, on the other hand, was no where near sleep. I looked over at him, and he looked so peaceful. It wasn't fair. I shouldn't wake him up. I shouldn't wake him up. I won't wake him up. I won't... I might... maybe I should. I don't want to be alone, but he has a lot of work to do. I'm assuming. He wouldn't tell me. I moved onto my side, propping my head up with my elbow just watching him. He's never looked this peaceful. I wondered what he was dreaming. I wish I could know. I would love to know what going on in his head. Anthony startled awake, his head snapping towards me. "Did I wake you up?" I asked and Anthony stared at me confused.

"Were you staring at me?" Anthony asked. Then his face turned from confusion and straight into worry. "Do you need something? Is something wrong?"

I opened my mouth about to tell him I was fine, but that didn't come out. "I love you, you know." I said into the silence of the room with Anthony still staring at me. "I know you told me not to, but I loved you the second I went into your office that night. Really the only reason a woman risks her honor. And I never stopped."

Anthony let out a deep, staring up at the ceiling. "I was an ass."

I put my hand on his chest, resting it onto his heartbeat. Anthony looked down at my hand with a small smile on his face face. "When I caught that fever...I woke up slightly. Never for long. I don't even think you noticed, but I heard you say some...odd things."

He looked up at me. "I don't know what you mean."

I scoffed. "I think you do, but I'm not going to make you tell me. I want you to tell me because you are ready. Now, are you still tired?" I could feel my smirk turn wicked.

Anthony lifted his head, giving me a questioning look. Then a wicked smile of his own spread across his face. Anthony rolled in the bed, over me and between my legs. "Somehow I think I can find the energy, but we will have to go slow not to over use your energy."

"Game on." Anthony laid down, pressing his lips against mine. It felt so good to be wanted by him. To know that my husband wanted me as much as I wanted him.

I spend the next day on my own. He had work to get done, and I wasn't bothered by it. I think Anthony felt bad having to leave him. He didn't say anything, but I could see it on his face. By the time night came around, I was sitting at my vanity, running a brush through my hair when the door swung open, and Anthony ran like there was a fire. I turned to look at him with wide eyes. "Is everything okay?" I asked in full panic.

Anthony paused, letting out a deep breath, "There is something you should know about me." He looked nervous, but he didn't look panicked. He didn't look like someone who needed to be coming into the room like someone was dying!

"You are coming in here like there is a fire!" I practically yelled at him.

Anthony looked at me and that was when I saw a sadness in his eyes. "I don't know how to tell you this without it sounding ridiculous."

I felt my hand hold tighter onto the brush as if it was the only way to brace myself for something was coming. "Sometimes the best option is just to say it. Do you want to sit with me?"

He shook his head, looking down. His fingers fidgeting at his side. "Something happened to me when my father died."

"You were close to him." I don't know why I needed to point that out, but Anthony nodded.

"Closer than I'd ever been to anyone, until I met you." Anthony slightly smiled, but it was a sad one.

I would have smiled if there wasn't a terrified not in my stomach. "What happened?"