Unwanted Daddy

Pray for Wings

**Warning. This chapter talks about suicide and obvious depression. If I'm being honest, it's quite sad at times. Please do not read if you do not want to hear about such things.**

The boys walked into Bobbi's bedroom suite to find her playing in the nursery with Nanny. The two of them were yelling at each other over a ruckus game of Hungry, Hungry, Hippo. When Nanny won, she threw her arms up in the air yelling, "Finally!"

Bobbi looked over to see her favorite men walk in just in time to see her defeat. She jumped up from the floor of her room and ran over to Riggs. "Daddy!"

Riggs picked her up, attaching her to the front of him. She wrapped her arms and legs around, then reached over for Oliver. He took her from Riggs, giving her a hug and kiss. Damen helped Nanny clean up the game, then sent her on her way, thanking her for the help. Oliver tickled Bobbi's sides, eventually plunking her down on her princess bed.

"Hey, Bug, we need to talk to you," Damen told her. All three men sat down on her bed to have their discussion. Bobbi climbed into her brother's lap, upbeat and full of smiles. "Do you remember the other day when Doctor Chris came to visit you?"

Bobbi's smile quickly turned into a frown. She held her arm out to her side. "He poked me. It hurt."

"Yeah, he did do that. He took your blood and did a bunch of tests with it. He came by today to tell us the results. Some of them weren't very good," Damen tried telling her.

"I'm bad?" she asked confused.

"That's not what he means when he says not good," Riggs tried to explain. "You're not bad, Baby, but there might be some bad things going on with your body. We don't really know yet. Doctor Chris would like you to visit the hospital for a couple of days to try to find out more."

Bobbi's hand came up to her chest. She began making small circles, while her breathing became harder and shallower. "People die there. Mommy and Daddy died. So did Auntie and Uncle." She turned to Damen. "I died there."

Tears started running down her cheeks. Damen tried wiping them away while simultaneously attempting to calm his sister down. "I know, and I'm sorry about that. But hospitals also make people better, Bobbi. More people walk out than don't. You walked out."

"I don't want to go," she sternly told the men. Bobbi removed herself from her brother's lap and headed out of the nursery. When she heard the men getting up off the bed, she turned around and held her hand up. "No. I need a minute."

She waited to ensure they had sat back down. She gave them a quick nod, then left the room. Where she was headed, she wasn't sure. All she knew was the day she left the hospital, she promised herself she'd never go back.

There was always a voice in the back of her mind that promised herself that if she did enough drugs, if she put her body through enough pain, she would die. The memory of thinking sometimes that it would happen, and wishing it to, seemed like so long ago. Waking up after passing out from too many pills or powder, used to depress her. She was keenly aware of the disappointment with herself when she didn't die. There were times that she would promise herself that she would do just a little more of whatever she was able to get, so the angels would take her. Those damn angels never seemed to listen to her prayers.

Now those wishes and pleas were for another day on earth, here, with her family. They had changed from wanting death, to worshiping life. Damen was no longer turned to Demon in her head. Thinking back, she can't really remember why she did it in the first place. Maybe it was easier to leave him behind if she hated him.

Then there was Riggs and Oliver. They made her so completely happy. Their love for her was something she never could have imagined feeling. She wasn't sure what she did to deserve it, but she loved that she had it. All the holes in her soul, in her life, finally felt like they were being filled, and that wasn't something she wanted to lose. Just as she was solidifying her place in the family's life, she's told her health is an issue. The hospital is where this all started to begin with. There was that nagging voice in her brain saying she won't be able to survive looking at those stark white hospital walls again. Those small medical beds with the side railings, and the table trays they put food on made her want to retch.