Right before I knew it, I was living in her world.....
It's not that, the more I try to overtake and possess the other version of me, the more I come to understand the "Why", "How", and "What" filling my head. That's because in order to overtake her, I need to suppress her consciousness which regularly connects me into parts of her consciousness.
[You need not question my reasons]
[I vowed to uphold our nation's pride]
[Everything I do is for everyone.....]
[There's no need to follow in my footsteps]
[Do as you wish. I do not care.....]
At first, I heard Bismarck's voice. It's her several conversations with Bismarck. Compared to the present, Bismarck acted strict and unmoving towards her younger sister. She can barely look Tirpitz in the eye and keeps ordering her like a stranger.
[If you refuse to seek strength, then you cannot return to the front lines]
The way Bismarck casts her away without even stopping to consider Tirpitz's thoughts and feelings reminds me of my Bismarck. It fills me with grudge and frustration.
"......."
Despite all the anger towards her sister, the little hatred in her heart is unbelievable. A part of Tirpitz couldn't bear deep hatred towards her sister.
Why?
Why?
Why?
Tirpitz keeps believing her Bismarck must have a reason and endured it all knowing Bismarck has to shoulder Iron Blood's ideals and stand as its unyielding leader. She never says anything, but no matter what happened......she still "loved" her sister.
"Why......?" I fall to my knees in utter confusion
Love? I'm a ship who's nothing but tragedy chained in the frigid north and mocked even in my death. How can I possibly still believe in love when I keep enduring hardships even as a kansen.
"What's wrong with her?"
Bismarck never once looked at Tirpitz with love or even reached out to her, yet the idiot keeps enduring it all. Even when she knows Bismarck's order might get her killed, she trusts her sister even when her entire body overheats. Having blind faith in the sister who never loved her is why she lost her emotions and has a dead META inside her.
"......."
As my hands press the soft snowy ground, tears begin to stream down from my cheeks when my heart first senses countless stinging then a blanket of warmth enveloping me.
"Bismarck did care for her....."
After going through her perspective, I can't deny the sadness and regret in Bismarck's eyes right before she turns away from her. It repeats several times and I think Tirpitz noticed it, so she could never truly hate Bismarck. No wonder she gave up the chance to end Bismarck and resisted when I almost killed her.
[I can't lose you, so don't you dare give up just yet.....]
It's faint, but when Tirpitz returns on death's door and after Bismarck learns she has a day left to live, Bismarck becomes honest since no one is looking or present. The older sister who always acts coldly fears for Tirpitz's life and......her tears fall into my hand.
.........
.........
.........
Love? It's a warm emotion as a result of caring and protecting others. That's right - people want to protect others because they love them.
"It's alright. Freezing or not, I'll still be here. Even if they don't want you anymore"
Prior to my death and when I still have a will to live, Victorious never once fears or despises me for being an incomplete META. In fact, her treatment of me hasn't changed in the slightest. She keeps holding my hand whenever I black out......so I wouldn't lose myself.
YOU ARE READING
Thaw out a Second Life
FanfictionA month after the incident with Victorious META, Tirpitz lives her second chance in life free of another ego and an enemy targeting her. Even so, she lives in worry and guilt from having to hide the cost of being able to live peacefully.
