Fake It - OP

Chapter 38

At this point, my feet should probably be numb, but somehow I still have energy like I just drank my fourth cup of coffee. The sun is starting to set now, and Oscar and I are walking up a ridge, just off the edge of Monaco, to a lookout I know from exploring a few weeks back.

After pancakes on Tuesday, Oscar and I spent the day in Niece playing tourist. We toured the museum and the art gallery. Saw some big monument I can't pronounce the name of, and ate lunch at a small mom-and-pop café right on the seaside. The drive alone to Niece would've been enough for me. We borrowed Lando's Jolly, which of course I made sure Oscar asked Lando if he could borrow first. And drove slowly for once along the seaside. Even the weather was perfect, not too hot that you craved air conditioning, but not cold enough to need a jacket. We drove back to Monaco the same way, discussing all the things we missed in the time between our kiss, and now. It felt- normal, safe. That night we ordered food again, because neither of us wanted to go grocery shopping, and we ate and fell asleep. Part of me feels bad for still making him sleep on the couch, but I know it's almost as comfortable as Lando's guest bed. And he seemed happy too.

Wednesday we spent the day at the beach eating way too much ice cream since it ended up being one of the hottest days of the year. Oscar blamed his third and fourth ice cream cones on the fact they were melting too fast so both just counted as one. Six hours swimming, lounging and reading. Later, we headed back to Lando's to change and the only instructions I got from Oscar on what to wear for dinner was "something fancy". So, I did. And I took a little too much satisfaction in the way that I looked when I thought Oscar just about passed out after seeing me. We went out for dinner at a local pasta place just outside of the tourist areas of Monaco, and just like the ice cream I couldn't get enough. Shamelessly of him, or the pasta. We both seemed to drop the facade we imagined for ourselves, and just let everything be in the present.

Yesterday Oscar thankfully wanted to have a slower day, and I silently thanked him for it. We got groceries, mostly because we couldn't live off takeout or the singular bag of potato chips we found in Lando's pantry. And made horrible but hilarious cookies. I convinced Oscar to make sugar cookies, so we bought the cutouts and decorated the person-shaped cutouts like each other and our friends. They were absolutely horrendous, but the idea and process were enough to make our stomachs hurt by the end of the day from laughing so hard. Oscar set aside his cookie that was supposed to look like Lando before we ate the rest. We ended the day on the couch with leftover pancakes and a marathon of Harry Potter movies on the TV.

This morning I woke up again to food and figured I could get used to Oscar handing me my coffee with a plate of food that tasted better than anything I could ever have made. And the thought somewhat scared me as well as comforted me. The feeling of contentment, just being near Oscar, the absolute practicality of having our morning coffees together every morning was comforting. And yes I was scared, but I wasn't scared for myself and getting my heart broken. I am scared it may end.

With Lando coming home early tomorrow morning we spent the morning blasting music and cleaning, with the exception of a trip to the library and a bookstore after breakfast where I realized Oscar had swapped my card for his in my wallet. So every time I tapped it to buy a book, well, he actually paid for it. I tried to hit him with one of the hardcovers I was carrying when I realized, but he just laughed at my feeble attempt. I now have more books that will fit in my suitcase to bring back eventually to Canada, but I can't really seem to care.

I thought that would be the last of today's adventure. But apparently, Oscar had other things in mind than pizza or cookies on Lando's couch again so now we are halfway up one of the hills off the side of Monaco with the growing ever cooler with the setting sun.

"So," I start. Oscar is a few steps ahead of me on the trail and I wonder how he's feeling doing all this while barely being off bedrest. "How much further to the top?" It's not like it's a difficult climb, but I'm allowed to be worried about him. Over the last few days he's been much improved, but I could tell some things still ached.