The world had always been a distant blur to Taehyung-something he observed from behind a thick glass, never quite stepping in. He existed, but he never truly lived. People admired him from afar, whispered his name like he was some untouchable myster...
"He held onto guilt like an old friend, but she held onto him like a promise."
***
CHAPTER – XXX ~ BURNING FOR YOU
🎧: "Cold Water" – Justin Bieber & Major Lazer
🌈AUTHOR's POV:
Taehyung didn't run this time.
He didn't know why he let Y/N stay. Maybe it was the exhaustion of running, or maybe it was the way she looked at him—not with pity, but with understanding. Whatever it was, it made his walls crack just a little more.
***
"Pain doesn't fade when you bury it—it lingers in the cracks until someone dares to see it."
***
For the first time in years, he let someone in. Let someone sit beside him in the silence, let someone see the cracks in his armor without trying to patch them up or push them away.
Y/N sat next to him on the piano bench, her presence warm, grounding. She didn't press him for answers, didn't force him to speak before he was ready. She just sat there, waiting.
Silence stretched between them. Taehyung's fingers twitched over the piano keys before curling into a fist. He had buried his past deep, locked it away in a place where even he refused to look. But Y/N was digging, and for some reason, he was letting her.
And maybe that's what made it easier for the words to come.
"You ever do something so small, so stupid, and it ruins everything?" His voice was barely above a whisper.
***
"Guilt is a ghost that lingers in the mind, whispering lies of blame and regret."
***
Y/N frowned. "What do you mean?"
Taehyung swallowed; throat dry.
"It was my birthday," he continued, his tone distant, detached. "I wanted ice cream. I threw a tantrum because my dad was busy with work and didn't want to take me out that late. My mom convinced him."
A bitter laugh escaped him. "I remember feeling so happy when we got in the car. Like I'd won. Like I had power over them."
Y/N's heart clenched. She could see it—the small boy, oblivious to the fate waiting ahead.
"I forced them to stay longer, to sit in the car while I ran to get my ice cream."
"And then I heard the explosion."
He sucked in a breath.
"I turned around, expecting to see my parents smiling at me from inside the car. But instead, there was fire. Thick smoke curling into the sky. The sound of metal twisting, flames crackling hungrily."
"I ran." His voice cracked.
"I ran until my throat burned. I screamed until my voice gave out. But I couldn't save them. My father's seatbelt got stuck, and he couldn't get out. My mother—she didn't even try. Maybe she didn't want to. Maybe she knew, deep down, that it was all over."
He trembled.
***
"The heaviest burdens are the ones we place upon ourselves."
***
There was a technical issue with the car," Taehyung continued, his voice barely above a whisper now. "An engine failure. A spark." He swallowed hard. "The explosion happened so fast. One moment, they were there. The next... they were gone."
Y/N felt tears sting her eyes. "Taehyung..."
Silence settled between them, heavy and suffocating.
Y/N's heart clenched at the anguish in his voice. Y/N sucked in a breath, but she didn't say anything. She let him speak.
"I killed them." His words were sharp, final. "Because I couldn't just let it go. Because I was stubborn and selfish."
"But I survived," he spat, like it was a curse.
***
"Survivor's guilt is a cruel trick of the mind—making you believe you were the villain when you were just a child lost in fate's storm."
***
"And now—" He exhaled shakily. "Now, every time someone gets too close, I can't breathe. Because what if I ruin them, too?"
Y/N didn't know what to say. No words could erase his pain, no comfort could undo the years he had spent drowning in guilt. But she knew one thing.
Y/N reached for his hand, gripping it tightly. "It wasn't your fault."
He let out a bitter laugh. "Everyone says that."
"Because it's true." Her voice was firm, unwavering. "You were eight, Taehyung. You were a child. Wanting ice cream on your birthday doesn't make you responsible for what happened."
He shook his head, pulling away. "You don't get it."
"I do." She grabbed his hand again, refusing to let him retreat. "You've been punishing yourself for something you had no control over."
His eyes darkened. "Then why do I still feel like I deserve it?"
Y/N's heart ached. "Because grief and guilt trick you into believing that."
He clenched his jaw, staring at their joined hands. He wanted to believe her. Wanted to let go of the weight that had been crushing him for years. But guilt was a stubborn thing.
Y/N squeezed his fingers. "But Taehyung... you don't have to carry this alone."
***
"The past can feel like a prison, but the right person will remind you the door was never locked."
***
Taehyung looked up, meeting her gaze. And for the first time in years, he felt something shift inside him.
Maybe—just maybe—he didn't have to.
His mask cracked completely. His body trembled; his breath uneven. And then, before she could react, he pulled her into his arms, burying his face into her shoulder.
Y/N wrapped her arms around him, holding him tightly as he broke apart in her embrace. The boy who had always kept his distance, who had buried his pain beneath cold stares and cruel words, was finally letting himself be vulnerable.
And she swore, in that moment, she would never let him feel alone again.
***
"He was drowning in memories, and she was the first hand that reached in without letting go."
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