Scream
When you first looked at me did you see me smile?
Did you assume my character because I showed you what I wanted you to see?
I really want to open up but the wounds only get deeper
And the people who see me are unqualified to treat them
I want to scream but I'm afraid you might hear me, judge me, misunderstand me
So, I scream internally and hope that pacifies the voiceless demon inside me.
My hands shake as I peel back the layers that even I don't want to see.
It always makes me cry, that's a weakness that frees me.
I can't explain, I don't have the energy
Don't hate me when you don't understand me.
I sleep to hide away from the constant happiness of the thing that chains me
The only problem is, I can't escape because it keeps me awake
I cry and hope it will stop clawing at me on the inside cause I make sure it won't drown
And yet still, it squeezes my heart, strangles my lungs and laughs at me
What have I done?
I want you to know but you will never really know.
They say everything happens for a reason.
Is there really a point in my suffering?
Does everyone suffer so they can help another who has suffered?
What if I don't want this?
Don't I get a choice?
Don't I get to avoid the multiple blows that break me down in front of your eyes?
Don't I get to be the one who laughs and not always the one who cries?
Don't I get to smile and not be afraid that my happiness will die and the moment will fade?
I want to explain but I can't.
You won't understand and I can't,
Muster up the energy to project an emotion you don't feel
So, I'll smile
Whilst everything inside me screams.
BY Butterfly Tears...
YOU ARE READING
A shadow of silhouettes
PoetryAs humans we paint a fabricated picture of who we are and what we stand for. We are caught in pits of hells as we try to impress the status quo of a today society's...
