Alexia Putellas - Funny moments
Y/n: Oh just so you know, it's very muggy outside
Alexia:
Alexia: Y/n, I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are on the front lawn...
Y/n: * Sips coffee from bowl*
Y/n: Which is correct, seven and five IS thirteen, or seven and five ARE thirteen?
Alexia: Neither.
Alexia: Because it's twelve.
Y/n: They don't make them like me no more. I'm the last of my kind.
Alexia: Thank god.
Alexia: *Walking in to a room* Sorry I'm late... I was... doing things.
Mapi: Oh, no, it's cool—
* Sounds of running footsteps progressively getting louder*
Y/n: * Out of breath* SHE PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKIN' STAIRS.
Alexia: You're giving me a sticker?
Y/n: Not just a sticker. That is a sticker of a kitty saying "me- wow!"
Alexia: I'm not a preschooler.
Y/n: Fine, I'll take it back
Alexia: I earned this, back off!
Y/n: Can I bother you for a second?
Alexia: You're always bothering me, but go ahead.
Alexia: This is such a bad idea.
Y/n: Then why are you coming along?
Alexia: One of us need to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.
Alexia: Okay, truth or dare?
Y/n: Truth
Alexia: How many hours have you slept this week?
Y/n:
Y/n: ...Dare
Alexia: Go to bed.
Y/n: I don't like this game.
Y/n: What if the 'g' in 'gif' is silent?
Alexia: Go the fuck to sleep
Y/n: What gif I don't want to?
Alexia: Fuck You!
Y/n: Kissing can burns 26 calories in a minute, wanna work-out with me? ;)
Alexia: Are saying that I'm fat?
Y/n: No that's not what I meant I-
Alexia: I fell—
Y/n: From heaven?
Alexia: No, I literally fell—
Y/n: In love with me the moment you saw me?
Alexia: MY ACL IS LITERALLY TORN!
Y/n: Okay, but do you think I'm pretty? Be honest.
Y/n: When are we gonna fuck?
Alexia: What?
Y/n: Oh sorry autocorrect. When are we gonna hang out?
Alexia: First of all that two words isn't even close to each other. And second of all, this is a verbal conversation...
Y/n: I'm having one of those things! A headache with pictures!!
Alexia: you mean an idea..?
Y/n: MMMMHHMMM!!
Alexia: Imagine being under 5'4'' and thinking you have a say in this situation, lol couldn't be me.
Y/n: You wanna keep those kneecaps you better stfu
Alexia: I'm sorry, I can't hear you from all the way down there, can you repeat that?
Y/n: I SAID FUCK YOU BITCH
Y/n: What is your biggest weakness?
Alexia: I can be uncooperative.
Y/n: Okay, can you give me an example?
Alexia: No.
Y/n: English is a difficult language. It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though.
Alexia: You need to stop.
Y/n, addressing the squad: And if you have any suggestions feel free to put them in the suggestion box.
Alexia: But – that's just a trash can.
Y/n: It sure is!
Y/n: Lol heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this lmfao
Alexia: What did you do now?
Y/n: A MISTAKE
Y/n: I can explain.
Alexia: Can you?
Y/n: If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie.
Alexia: Do you have any skeletons in your closet?
Y/n: You mean literally or figuratively?
Alexia: Honestly, the fact that I have to specify...
Alexia: It's dark in here
Y/n: Don't worry dude I got this
Y/n: *Stomps their feet*
Y/n: *Skechers light up*
Alexia: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
Y/n, drinking toast: Why do you say that?
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England Lionesses One Shots
FanfictionIn which I write one shot stories about the England women's football team (I may throw in a couple of other players from different countries ;) )
