Séa Gets Lucky

26. Negotiations and Irony

"By the weave," gasped Ghomarck, "my eyes are opened. It's a cockroach, not a beetle."

"Pff." The incubus waved a dismissive hand.

Is it? I mean, is that really a stylized cockroach? Maybe. Tash kept her thumbs in her belt, but her eyes roved the room, scanning for more gems or bits of gold.

Séa folded her arms across her chest. "It is understandable that Zorexis, if that is his name, wishes to downplay the seriousness of this little invasion. We have already established that King Pharing is the real target of this ploy. Whatever trick the demons have concocted will not go well for our monarch. Also, they wouldn't target a king without also targeting his kingdom. The entire kingdom of Omnius is at risk." Séa inhaled deeply, then huffed air through her nose. "There you have it. I didn't really want to say it all in front of the demon, but there it is. What's done is done."

Dooch blinked overlarge eyelids. Zorexis stood still, hands clasped in contrition.

"I don't believe it," Chantelle said.

The paladin sighed. Her eyes lowered. "Was afraid you wouldn't. But I'm not lying."

The wizard sat slumped on the settee. His eyes opened halfway. "The longer we wait, the weaker we become." As if to prove his point, his eyelids fluttered closed again.

Dooch croaked, "He means you don't really have a choice, unless you're ready to fight every wight at once. And probably the guardian, too."

The demons are really selling this. I think they really want out of here.

"Please allow me," Zorexis said, "to demonstrate my good intentions, and at the same time pay off some of my debt of gratitude. You did, after all, bravely penetrate Buzzard Keep. You have come within a hair's breadth of accomplishing your goal of rescue. I also noticed that you have respected the woman I cherish. I wish to reward you."

"Don't even," Séa grumbled.

Zorexis smiled, a dazzling experience unto itself. "Allow me to rephrase. I will reward you. A sack of treasure for dashing Tash, and a map of the current location of the Crusade's launching point for our dauntless demon hunter Séa."

A sack of treasure? Tash said, "You're on. Show me the money."

Séa's shoulders slumped.

She's sure they're scheming.

Well, so am I, but I think they're scheming for our temporary benefit. But she's sure ... and now I'm doubting myself.

Dooch crouched to one side of Séa. Long, lumpy fingers wrapped around the knee joint of her left side greave. No hums or smells accompanied the transformational magic the demon employed. At times, a faint glow appeared at the spot, like forge-heated steel. The most reliable indicator of progress is that Dooch's overlarge eyes would close in dreamy concentration. Apparently, whatever the toady demon imagined came to pass beneath his mottled hands.

"Here I am," the paladin murmured, "accepting help from my sworn enemy. Torugg must think I've been smoking mushrooms. Father Kay would kick me out of class."

"Swing your leg. How's that?" Dooch rasped.

"Good. I can swing it all the way back."

"Nice, nice, nice. Now let me get the rust off your mace."

"Eh? Oh, all right."

The short creature cradled the vaned head of the weapon in his hands without even bothering to remove it from Séa's belt.

Séa continued her soliloquy as if uninterrupted. "Furthermore, I'm not paying you or anything. It's like you're a smith from the Crusade. They just fix whatever needs fixing. They're part of the larger effort. But you're not. You're a demon. Does that mean I'm enslaving you? If so, I'm a really horrible person."

"I'm still hoping for a thank you fuck."

Séa's brows knit, and her mouth tightened to a flat, compressed line. "Hope away."

"Maybe suck my li'l Dooch 'til I sploot?"

"I—" Her hands groped as if attempting to catch words from the very air, then balled into fists. "Cancel all the sympathetic things I just said, demon. Are you finished? Can we leave?"

A/N: