Enhypen Imagines | Enhypen x Reader

Stay - Sunghoon x Reader

Disclaimer ! Mentions of suicidal attempts, thoughts and anxiety/panic attacks! Please skip this one-shot if that is triggering for you!

"Let me go!" I shout out as Sunghoon's arms wrap tighter around my waist stopping me from taking another step forward.

"Never! I'm not letting you do this!" Sunghoon cries out desperately, the feeling of his tears hitting my shoulder. What if this is what I want? I don't think I can hang on any longer...

I stare at the setting sun that paints the sky into a dusk rose into a midnight purple before turning pitch black. The most beautiful time of day. I wanted to witness it one more time standing on this rooftop before ending what was already planned to end eventually so I decided to make it sooner. My life.

"Please," he whispers out weakly, "I need you."

"For what, Sunghoon? What am I to you, to anyone? Huh?" I rasp out as he just shakes his head into my shoulder gripping onto me tighter.

"Because," he pauses, not finishing his sentence only his voice turning to heartbreaking sobs.

"Not even you know Sunghoon," I sniffle out feeling my own eyes begin to water like they have so many times before this. I'm just any other person, I'm nobody special which is why you shouldn't be hurt if I leave.

"You need to just let me go, stop holding on to something that means nothing in this world," I say softly, giving his hand a squeeze, preparing to take a step further on the ledge but Sunghoon pulls me off completely, "hey! What are you doing?"

"This," he replies and before I have any time to react he flips my body towards him. My face inches away from his as he wastes no time in connecting our lips. My mind stops completely. I can't process anything that's happening but my heart responds by kissing back. It was deep and passionate, so full of...love.

After a minute we both pull away panting, "I love you, Y/n. Please don't do this. I need you. We can get help, just please, don't leave me."

I'm left speechless. My heart races against my chest as I clutch my shirt, digging my fingers into the clothing. How can this be happening? How can someone love me of all people, especially someone like Sunghoon? I was ready to be face to face with death but now I don't know. What should I do? What should I do?!? What are you doing to me, Park Sunghoon?

My breath quickens feeling the need for air but I can't seem to breathe deeply enough to take in any. Why can't I breathe?

"Y/n? What's happening?" Sunghoon asks softly, gently holding my shoulder. The pain in my chest only increases as if an elephant is sitting on top of it. I curl into a ball convincing myself it'll help with the pain but there was no difference. Please take the pain away. Please, just take it away. I openly sob into my hands wanting everything to be over. My vision slowly started forming black dots into the ground as my head began to feel dizzy.

The last thing I remembered was Sunghoon hurriedly carrying me in his arms shouting for help as my entire world turned dark.

******

I woke up to a bright fluorescent light stinging my eyes making me squint them in protest. A chair screeches against the floor as footsteps move closer to my direction rapidly. Where on earth am I? It takes a minute or so more for my eyes to adjust to see exactly where I am. A hospital. How did I get here?

"Y/n! I'm so glad you're okay," Sunghoon gasps out between choked sobs as I weakly smile at him. Looking at him reminded me of everything that happened and it all set in. I was so close to death. But I still want it, I don't think I can continue living like this even with Sunghoon's support. And how can I know he won't leave like the rest of them?

The nurse that alerted the doctor I was awake and opened the door for him before he entered with his clipboard, "good afternoon Ms. Y/n, I assume you know why you're here." I nod glancing over at Sunghoon who has calmed down some but holds my hand tightly in his as if any second he doesn't I'll disappear.

"I heard about the incident that has happened and we're more than willing to lend you the help you need to heal," the doctor says flipping his paper on the clipboard, "we will keep you in the hospital for a few more days as we want to make sure when you leave you're able to heal and not return to the emotional state that caused this."

I stare at my hands with a long sigh escaping me, "how do I know this will actually help?"

"We don't know either but," the doctor pauses, finding the right words, "we want the best for you Ms. Y/n and the only way to do that is to try different methods of help. Lucky for you, you have someone by your side who will be with you the whole way." The doctor glances at Sunghoon who nods with a sweet smile towards me. My heart begins to feel guilty for him, that he's stuck in this situation because he somehow fell in love with a mess. I wish you hadn't fallen for someone so screwed up in the mind, Sunghoon. But I'd never say it out loud because deep down I wasn't willing to let him go at the same time. Yet you're willing to let yourself go?

"The nurse will be in soon to check your vitals again and give you some food and water when she comes," the doctor says heading towards the door, "we can discuss further about getting you help later, just rest for now Ms. Y/n."

I nod weakly as he exits the room just leaving Sunghoon and I.

"Sunghoon," I call out as he looks up to me with red-rimmed eyes making my heart feel heavy. I did that to him, I'm so sorry.

I sigh heavily and rest my other hand on top of our already intertwined ones, "I still don't understand why you saved me. I don't know what you want with a mess like me. But I'll tell you this, if you give me time, I can try to learn to heal. I only think I'd be able to heal with you by my side because if you leave I'll never have the strength to heal on my own. I don't know if this will work but I can try."

He stares at me wide-eyed, still clutching my hand tightly after my confession, "do you really mean it Y/n?" His voice came out hoarse most likely from crying for I don't know how long.

"The truth is I've liked you for a while but I didn't want you to have to deal with the mess I am so I never said anything," I whispered softly and brushed away his hair that covered his eyes, "but please promise to never leave me Sunghoon?"

I hold out my pinky as he takes it in his gently.

"I promise to help by staying by your side for as long as I'm able and hope you can find the joy of life through me," he says softly planting a soft kiss on our locked pinkies. I feel my face flush at the action. I'll work hard so that you don't ever find the depressing side of life that I've experienced too much of. I hope we can find a balance between us too, Park Sunghoon. And I hope one day I can grow to love you as much as you love me.