Family Secrets

Chapter Twenty-One

Mrs. Henderson was more than happy to welcome me into her home. She called for her maids to open the nursery. Once she heard why her son had brought me there, I thought she would storm out of the house to find Miss Greaves herself.

Of course I knew that I wouldn't be able to stay for long. Given how scandalized everyone had been when I'd simply shared the Henderson pew, it would be even worse once they knew I was at Henderson Hall. The things they would say!

Still, it was so nice to be taken care of and not to worry about what was being said behind my back. Oh, I'm sure the Henderson servants were speculating belowstairs, but they couldn't possibly be as malicious or cruel as Miss Greaves had been.

But I should have known that Miss Greaves wouldn't be content with being asked to leave. She had always threatened consequences for defying her. I had laughed it off, but I really should have taken her more seriously.

"The strangest thing happened," Mrs. Henderson said as she came into the nursery. Mrs. Fillington gave me the cut direct in the village."

"She did?" I exclaimed, softly because Honora had just fallen asleep. "That's very strange. I'm afraid I don't know her very well. Miss Greaves would visit with her often, I think."

Mrs. Henderson made a sound that sounded suspiciously like a snort. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised," she said. "They are similar in attitude and outlook. I'm sure their conversations were full of judgement against the entire neighborhood."

Glancing down at Honora, I came to a decision. "I'm sorry," I said, trying to gather my courage. "I think I am to blame for your friend cutting you."

"Oh, there's no need to take the blame," Mrs. Henderson said, waving her hand dismissively. "I wouldn't have characterized us as friends in the first place. Mrs. Fillington is always looking for offense. I'm sure she will forget all about it, or find something else to be upset about."

"No." I carefully placed Honora in the crib and then sat down. "I must tell you the truth about what I have done."

It was impossible for me to meet her gaze as I confessed. I didn't try to excuse my actions or to try to explain myself. I simply told her how I had first met Conrad Ingram, what I had done for him, and then how I had ended up in the tangle I was in. It wasn't easy to find the words, but I muddled through it.

"Miss Greaves was supposed to keep my name free of scandal," I continued, trying to keep my voice steady. "She tried to blackmail me when she learned something scandalous about my grandmother. I don't know if my father paid her more money. I believe she has blackened my name in the neighborhood and you will be ostracized because you have taken me in."

The other woman didn't say anything. I took a deep breath. "I will go back to Gardenview," I said. "Honora and I will find some way to get by. I understand if you never wish to speak to me again."

Mrs. Henderson's hand came around mine. "I must insist you stop such talk," she said, her tone firm but kind. "We will not throw you out or some such nonsense. We would never do that."

Tears I had been holding back escaped my eyes. "But I have been wicked," I whispered. "I know I have. I knew it when I did it, but I didn't care. And that makes it all worse. Because I knew it was wrong and I did it anyway."

"Of course it was wrong, but you will not do so again, will you?" Mrs. Henderson responded, her tone reassuring.

How like her son she sounded! "But is it wrong that I don't regret that it brought me Honora?" I asked. "I regret that I trusted Conrad Ingram at all. I knew better and ignored everything I had ever been taught about how a lady should behave. But I love my daughter. I wouldn't have her if I hadn't associated with that man. I get so confused when I try to untangle it all."