The Other Side

22

Cordell P.O.V
I kissed Cévon's jaw from behind and I stood behind him watching him roll up on his counter in his kitchen. He was kinda quiet today and I know exactly why. His mother was in the hospital and sober so he decided to question her about what his dad said to him. She revealed it all to be true and that she did like about his age and about him leaving to him and his brother because of her addiction. He was hurt that she would do that. This whole time he thought he had a father that just left him and wanted nothing to do with him, but he had been falsely accused and in prison.

I felt really bad for him. Not to mention that half of the shit that happened to him wouldn't have happened. I found out something the hard way about him and now he's been pretty quiet. For one, he was mad at his mom, two his father was meeting up with him today somewhere, three I had found out the hard way that he doesn't like to be choked...I felt like shit after, but then I realized he was just having a trauma reaction and that I hadn't done anything.

After choking him he kinda grabbed my arm quickly and sat up pushing me away from him while breathing hard and covering his body. I didn't understand why or what that meant at first, but then he quickly cussed me out about not doing that. He got up putting all his clothes on since we were naked making me grab him back and hold him. I made him calm down and then he explained to me that when he was younger one of the guys that used to be around his mom took him so she could get some drugs and he used to...choke him while doing shit to him. He also told me how his mom tried to sell him to that same nigga agin, but his brother who was still a child at that time fucked him up and made sure he was protected.

That was the most personal shit that he told me and I was glad he was sharing with me, but I was just upset and sad that it happened to him. I will never choke him again I didn't mean to trigger him. Seems like I'm always doing that, but at least this time I was about to get him to talk before he ran. Now he was feeling better, but still quiet. He a lot going on today.

Not to mention his brothers death anniversary was nearing and I could tell it was starting to get to him. He's been much quieter these last few days and not as many jokes. He said he wanted to stay quiet so he didn't accidentally cuss me out from being I we while we and I understood that. I was still messing with him a little bit making him smile as much as I could and it was working, but today was definitely one of those more gentler days.

"Where are you and yo dad or should I am just say Memphis, meeting?" I asked him as he sighed.

"Uh I don't even know. I think he wanted to meet at some restaurant, but...I don't know. Maybe I should just block him and go about my life the same way it was before. I don't think that he'll care too much," he spoke making me rub his sides gently as he continued rolling his blunt.

"Is that what you want though oh are you letting your nerves take over? You don't want a relationship with your dad? What if he's like the best dad ever? Don't let your nerves get to you baby. You can't run away from everything that's new and scares you. Sometimes you gotta run towards that shit to get through because if you don't you're always gonna wonder what if," I told him as he sighed.

"I kinda wanna dad, but I don't want him to think he can start telling me what to do and shit. I don't know how the dynamic will be and I honestly don't think it will change anything about me.  Like...I'm still gone be the same person. Will having him around even make me happy? What if he's another bad person or he tried to set me up or something? Then what?" He spoke turning to look up at me and wrapping his arms around my neck. "I don't think I would be that hurt though. As long as I gotchu I'm good. You make me happy so you better not ever break up wit me,"

"Never baby. I'm more worried about you breaking up with me. I feel like I be annoying you," I told him chuckling making him shake his head.

"Nah not seriously, but even if you do you gone have to do something crazy to have me to break up with you. Like if you lie to me about some real serious shit or betray me then imma break up wit you. Simple shit like annoying me not gone make me break up wit you. I love you," he told me making me nod my head.