Demons, Swords, And Other Things That Nearly Killed Me

PAYING CHILD SUPPORT IN GOLD

"So nice to see you again. It sounded like you missed me."

Buggy the ticking time bomb went off immediately. "YOU'VE BEEN MISSING FOR SIX FUCKING YEARS AND WHEN YOU FINALLY DECIDE SHOW UP IT'S ON MY GODDAMN SHIP??!"

He was plugging his ears with his fingers. "That's no way to speak to your husband, Buggy. You've also got a really nice chair--"

The clown shrieked over him- his floating head right up in Crooner's face. He didn't fail to notice how his face had grown pink. Even through Buggy's yelling, he stared at his face, eyes full of affection as warmth radiated off of him.

"GET OFF MY FUCKING THRONE, CROONER!"

Crooner smiled and leaned forward, inches away from Buggy's face. He could feel the heat that was radiating off of him. "What? It's the first time in years we've talked to each other and you wanna yell instead of having some fun? Even when I saw Shanks, we partied. I still have bruises, yannow?"

"AUGHHH-- DON'T TALK ABOUT THAT IDIOTIC RED HAIR AROUND ME!"

The captain laughed, grabbed the sides of Buggy's head like a basketball, and put a bit of distance between them.

"Come on, loosen up! I wasn't even missing. And I'm only joking!" Partially.

"Where the hell were you?! What were you doing?! AND GET OUT OF MY THRONE I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO'S FLASHY ENOUGH TO SIT IN IT!" The blue haired captain was hollering at Crooner. Crooner watched as Buggy's headless body rushed towards him, reached over the desk and towards him as his hands popped off and started pulling at his face.

The white-haired man whined. "Leh- goh offhmy facssh..."

"LET GO OF MY DAMN HEAD YOU MORON--"

He pulled him closer

"What, you don't wanna kiss?"

"ISAIDLEMMEGOBEFOREIKILLYOU--"

The captain grew smug as he let go of Buggy's head. Crooner grabbed the wrists of the man's hands and also tugged them off his face as the clown's head returned to his body.

He's so stingy. Hell, I expected a kiss from him. His eyes raked over Buggy's form slowly. He's gotten more handsome the last time I saw him. He grinned as he noticed the slight muscle under his shirt. Oh hello there...

"OFF THE THRONE. GET OFF OF THE THRONE NOW!!"

"I'm getting up, Buggy, I'm getting up." Crooner collected the papers with one of his hands, the arms below him folded against his bare chest.

"PUT A SHIRT ON YOU HARLOT!"

"Ah, you remind me of a hottie I met at Water Seven, do you know each other-?"

"COVER YOURSELF AND GET OUT! OUT OF MY OFFICE RIGHT NOW--"

"Do you want me to put on my shirt or do you want me to get out of your chair? Ah, maybe you want me to go to your bed and not the chair so it's easier--"

The clown's face turned as red as his nose. Even though it had been nearly two decades since they last saw each other, he still made passes at him. Buggy hated that Crooner refused to wear a shirt around anyone anymore. It was a fight for anyone outside of his crew to get him to wear pants that didn't hug his legs tightly. The only other thing that covered that man's body was the captain's coat that he wore.