Just My Luck

Assassination Failed

UN's POV

EU and I walked into the UN building and headed straight to the floor with all the organization's offices. When we got out of the elevator, we saw ASEAN and NATO standing near the door to the little break room we had for just us. NATO looked like he was dying and was leaning against the wall like he was in pain while ASEAN was laughing at him. "What's going on here?" EU asked, "I have the biggest fucking hangover right now and I think I'm going to throw up," NATO groaned, "what's a hangover?" I question, it sounds like something is just hanging over a ledge or something, "it's when someone gets very drunk and the next morning they have a massive headache," EU explained, "yeah, me and NATO went bar hopping last night and he got super shit faced," ASEAN said smirking, "you did too asshole," NATO yelled back, "yeah yeah, but not as drunk as you," "I wasn't even that drunk," "tell me, does your ass hurt right now?" "Oh my god, did you guys have sex???" EU recoiled in shock, "hell no, NATO went home with what he thought was a girl last night, but it was actually a boy in a ponytail and I went in the uber with them to make sure he wasn't trying to like hurt him or anything and while we were in the uber he was asking me about if NATO was gay and a power bottom because he wanted to fuck NATO because he thought he was cute and he was totally going along with NATO thinking he was a girl."

We all stayed silent for a moment before NATO said, "you fucking asshole, you let me get fucked in the ass by some random man!?" "Bitch you literally said yes to when he asked if you wanted to bottom and get pegged!" ASEAN retorted; I just watched the two shorter men fight while having no idea what they were talking about. I knew they were talking about NATO 'doing it' with a man, but I had no idea what they meant by 'power botton' and NATO agreeing to be a bottom, bottom of what? And what does ASEAN mean when he says NATO agreed to be 'pegged'? "What is a power bottom?" I question, "nothing, don't worry about it," EU says while petting me, "hold up, was the guy who fucked NATO drunk? Because I'm pretty sure it's rape if one person is drunk and the other isn't," EU questioned, ASEAN shook his head and said, "I watched the guy chug down like 3 bottles of vodka, there was no way in hell he wasn't drunk," EU nods and says, "ok good, for a second there I thought NATO was raped," NATO rolled his eyes and ASEAN said, "but you want to hear the weird thing about that guy," ASEAN said, "what's weirder then the fact that he fucked me," NATO spat at him, "when he was leaving at like 2 in the morning, mind you that we went to NATO's house at like midnight, I was sitting on the couch and he said 'see you soon ASEAN,' and I brushed it off at the time but now that I think of it, it was a weird thing to say," "he probably wants to fuck you like he fucked me," NATO grumbled, "I'm also pretty sure he was doing something in your room while you were asleep because you stopped moaning after an hour or something so you should probably make sure your credit cards weren't stolen, or something valuable," "wait a minute, how the fuck did he know you were ASEAN and I was me, didn't we go to the bar in our human forms or something," "oh yeah, we did, he probably saw a picture of you or something," "where was Bear during this? I feel like he wouldn't be so happy to see a stranger taking his father to his bedroom and locking themselves in it for 2 hours," EU says, "he was too busy getting affection from my drunk self to notice NATO disappeared for 2 hours," ASEAN replied.

"I think we should stop talking about this, I think we should get to work since I assume we all have a lot of paperwork, and ASEAN and EU, don't you both have meetings today?" I say, really wanting to change the subject, I felt weird about talking about NATO's... personal affairs. "Oh alright, I wanted to make fun of NATO, but I do have to get all my stuff for the meeting, see y'all later," the 3 of us said our goodbyes to ASEAN and he walked away to his office to get his meeting stuff, "so, when were you going to tell me you were gay NATO?" I question him, "I'm bi, I prefer women more than men, but I am attracted to men," he explains, I nod and pat him on the head, "don't pet me, just because you're taller than me and EU does it to you, doesn't mean you can do it to me," he huffs before walking off to his office.