She's With Me

We're Strangers, Aren't We?

There was another muffled voice in the background that sounded a bit closer, "Who's that?" the voice asked and Evie felt herself internally wince a little. Josh's quiet voice replied, "Evie." The background noise eventually quieted and Evie could hear the squeaking of what sounded like a door opening, "Are you sure?" Evie broke the silence, "I don't wanna be a bother. And it's really, really not safe for you to come out here."

"Well," Josh replied coolly, "I would think this is a valid emergency, something that we should talk about face to face. Send me a pin of your location, and I'll come see you so we can figure this out together." She could hear keys jingling in the background. It wasn't up for debate, apparently. He was coming to see her whether she wanted it to happen or not. "I'll send it to you in a second," Evie replied quietly, "See you in a bit."

The line clicks and for a moment, Evie glances over the waters ahead of her to allow the reality of the situation to settle in her mind. She was pregnant with a celebrity's baby. A minor celebrity, yes, but still popular enough to be known online and have people talk about him online. Eventually they'd know about her and they'd find out she was pregnant. They'd probably be mad or shame her. Call her terrible names simply because she was the one who got to be with Josh. The one who got his attention and love behind the scenes. She was carrying his child. All of these thoughts were going through her head while she gave Josh the address of the park she was at. For a moment she thought of just jumping into the river that laid ahead of her. It wasn't going very fast but, maybe it would be enough to just whisk her away from here and all her worries.

Josh arrived not but 20 minutes later. Evie was still perched on the edge of the docks when his Jeep pulled into the parking lot. She couldn't even look at him. Eye contact would make her cry instantly, but she knew he was there. A few moments of silence passed before the sound of heavy footsteps against the aging wooden docks grew louder and louder until they stopped short behind her. "Evie?" his tone was reassuring as he squatted down beside her, "You okay?" She wanted to turn around and hug him. It had been nearly a week since they'd seen each other. Two big hands wrapped around her shoulders and gently pulled her back into his arms and when she finally managed to get the courage to look up, there were two big brown eyes looking back down at her. She wanted to both cry and hug and kiss him all at once.

"You're gonna sit in goose poop if you're not careful," Evie said quietly, which brought a grin to Josh's face. "Then why are you sitting in it?" She lets herself fall into his arms the rest of the way and wraps them around his back to hug him tightly. He smelled so nice. "I'm used to it," Evie mumbled into his neck, "Farm girl life, you know?" There was stifled laughter that came from Josh and though despite her warnings, he eventually sat down on the dock beside her. "Farm girl huh?" Josh mused, "Didn't know you grew up on a farm."

"You don't know much about me," Evie pulls herself away from Josh's embrace, "And now here I am, pregnant with your kid."

"You say that like it's a bad thing." Josh had turned his attention to looking out over the water. Evie pressed her lips together into a thin line, "I mean... how do you feel about it?"

"Mmm," Josh hummed thoughtfully, "It's definitely a surprise. I mean, I've always known I wanted to be a parent someday. It's a little early, since I'm not quite 24 yet but hey– shit happens."

There were kids in the park now playing on the playground equipment up on the hill behind them. Evie found it ironic how the laughter of little kids was the background noise for this conversation. "What do you want to do?" Evie was looking directly down at the murky water at her feet, wondering just how deep the Cumberland was, "I mean I understand if–"

"I'd like to do the right thing," Josh interrupted her, "It's incredibly unexpected, yeah, but–" he pauses to place his hand against his chest, "--To me, personally.. I think babies are a blessing. I wouldn't mind keeping it, but that's only if you want to."

An abortion had crossed her mind briefly when the doctor had confirmed the test results with her. And she didn't really feel much better hearing that Josh wanted to keep it. "Is there something that's worrying you?" Josh asked, "Because if it's monetary stuff or like, worrying about a place to stay or fo–"

"No it's–" Evie sighed, "It's not that I don't want to keep it. I'm just... afraid. Back home, I played Mom to my younger siblings because my own mother was too high to give a shit about any of the babies she popped out," Anger was building in her voice as she spoke, "And my dad was too busy not being at home, also getting high or sleeping with other women; so, it was just me. One day, I left. I left my little sisters and brothers behind and I called CPS. Then I never looked back. I told myself I'd never, ever put myself through that again. And I know it might just be one baby, but I'm just so... scared I won't be a good mother because of what happened to my siblings."

Silence fell over the couple. And for just a few moments it was just the sound of children laughing intermixed with the lapping of the waves against the dock. She half expected him to leave after that outburst and she felt like crying again. "Do you know what happened to your siblings?" Josh broke the silence after a few moments. "I never did follow up closely," Evie felt like her heart was going to leap out of her chest, "I was contacted by CPS a week after I got to Nashville. They told me that my siblings were removed from my parents' care and asked if I wanted custody of them. I told them to contact my older brother Tyler. Sometimes, I get calls from a number that matches my brother's area code. But I never answer them. I don't know what I would even say."

More silence followed. But it was shorter this time. "I'm sorry you had to go through that, Evie. I really... can't imagine what that must've been like. I really can't. But in all honesty... it sounds to me like you did... you did what any good caregiver would do."

"I failed them," Evie mumbled, "I failed them because I couldn't do it. And now they probably hate me for sending them away. For me running away from them and leaving them in that shit hole all alone."

"Calling child protective services isn't failure," Josh scoots a bit closer and wraps his arms around her shoulder to pull her closer, "Weren't you 18 when you left? You were still a kid yourself. I think anyone would have done what you did in your situation. It doesn't make you a bad person or parent."

"It feels like it does," Evie lets herself come to rest back up against Josh's shoulder, "I don't want to fail another kid."

"You won't," Josh reassured her, "At least not with me here. Listen, let's get out of here, off this rickety old dock here and we can get something to eat. Talk about this more. Have you had anything to eat this morning?" Evie wordlessly shakes her head and Josh stands up, patting the dirt and dust off of his clothes, "All the more reason you should get up, and we go eat. And then maybe afterwards we can do a re-introduction to my brothers?" The suggestion alone was enough to pull Evie out of her slump with a shocked look on her face, "Meet them? Today? Are we going to...?"

Josh reaches a hand out to help her up off the ground, "Well, we don't have to tell them yet. I think maybe it might be in our best interest to not say anything until we figure out what we're gonna do first. The less people that know, the better." Evie takes his hand and uses it to pull herself up to a standing position. She, too, brushes herself off. At least he didn't want to blab his mouth off to the future potential uncles of this clump of cells inside of her. Or was it more than a clump of cells now? Did it look like a baby yet?

The couple leaves the dock and heads back over to Josh's car and Evie briefly glances back over to her beaten up red sedan, "Do I just... leave this here?" Josh unlocks his Jeep and purses his lips together with a thoughtful hum, "You know, now that I think about it, why don't we just head back to your apartment first. You can get dressed into something a little more appropriate for the day and then we can get lunch?"

"Sounds good to me."

The more she thought about it, the better lunch sounded. There was absolutely nothing in her stomach now and she wasn't feeling quite so nauseous anymore. She unlocks her car door and takes a seat inside. "Just send me the address to your place in case we get separated," Josh called out from his Jeep before it starts up, "I'll meet ya there!"