If I Lose Myself

Catalina

I woke up with a smile on my face and it scared me a bit. I can't remember the last time I woke up happy. Look through my closet for today's outfit I heard my dad in the kitchen. I realized that I haven't asked my dad if I can go tonight. Walking into the kitchen he was pouring a cup of coffee. I sat on the island staring at him until he turned around.

"Geez, Catalina. Don't do that." I giggled at the look my dad had on his face.

"Sorry daddy. I didn't mean to scare you."

"You didn't scare me, you just surprised me." He sat next to me kissed my temple. "How did you sleep?"

"Good, actually but I wanted to ask you something?" I said as I took his coffee taking a sip.

"Okay, ask away baby." I smiled at the nickname he gave me it was becoming a regular thing.

"Can I go to Bo and Cam's football game tonight?" Shock crossed his face at my question.

"What made you want to go?" I shrugged.

"He asked my last night if I wanted to go and I said yes. But I wanted to make sure it was okay?" My dad nodded looking thoughtful.

"Okay, but you have to take Titus and Corvette with you." I thought about it I guess it was a win, win.

"Okay, can I borrow the car again?" My dad nodded drinking his coffee.

"I was thinking and decided that you can have the car. I'm always riding my bike so it just sits there." I looked at him with surprise I was not expecting that.

"Really? Just like that."

"Just like that."

"Thank you, daddy." I smiled and hugged him.

"You're welcome." His eyes scanned my face when we pulled away. "You're happy this morning." I smiled looking down because I really was.

"Well, Yesterday I ran into an old friends and she knew what happened at moms. But she moved around a lot. So yesterday when I was with the boys I ran into her." I smiled remembering how much we laughed "It was a refreshing thing."

"What boys?" He sent a glare my way making me laugh.

"Bo and Cam. They ambushed me at Michaels. They took me to lunch because I decided if I was ever going to get past my past. I have to move forward."

The look on my dad's face said it all, he was proud of me. I think it was for the fact that I was taking everything well given the fact of what happened. Because not too long ago I was being abused by my step-dad and now. Now I was in a warm home where my dad is caring for me. Not once did my dad make a comment about my eating habits, he is letting me doing things on my own with little help. But I would love him to be a parent and tell me to clean the house or I'll be grounded. Not that I'll do anything bad. And for the club, I'm starting to think I jump the gun on them.

They have done nothing wrong to me.

"I'm proud of you baby girl. Despite everything you've been through, you are willing to go out there." He threw his arm over my shoulders pulling me to him. I returned the favor and hugged him back.

"I just don't want to live in fear anymore."

"I know baby, I know."

I stayed in the kitchen with my dad for most of the morning. I did, in fact, find out what school I was going to be going to which was Rosewood. I was actually happy about that because Sammy went there, but part of me was not so sure that doubt was still there. It was here to stay I just knew it and for the fact that things are actually looking up. I felt like it was the quite before he storm. You know it's coming, yet, there are no signs of it and you know it's there just waiting.