✅ A Dose of Humiliation

83. Testing Limits

This bonus chapter is dedicated to babysofia1234. Thank you!

I blinked as I woke up, and something felt different. But my body was already moving on instinct, checking my diaper. I wasn't wet this morning, which was a good sign. Of course, I hadn't drunk so much last night. I might have been totally wasted when I got back from school, but that had been in the middle of the day and there'd been plenty of time to get it out of my system. And I knew that I'd wet myself again late in the evening, but that meant I'd been able to change right before bed, which then meant that there was almost no chance I'd wake up wet too. My bladder had been empty all night.

I stood up and took the diaper off before walking across to the bathroom. And that was when I realised what had felt so awkward on waking. I wasn't in a place of my own now; this was Mum and Dad's house, and anything I did wrong was sure to attract way too much attention. I hated thinking about the day ahead, but I knew that it was something I would have to put up with for now. Just a couple of days and I would have the debate certificate that I needed; and then a week or two more before Serena was facing Becker in court. Then it wouldn't be so bad for me living here, because either I'd get the antidote and it would actually be possible to follow all their crazy rules, or they'd be in jail alongside the monster who had put me through this and the house would be all mine. And as much as I wanted to tell myself that one was the bad ending, it sounded better than how things were now.

I probably should have put on a clean diaper and tried to get ready for the day ahead; or just a pull-up while I had breakfast. But I knew that something was going to start today; something intended to humiliate me in front of my friends, and destroy my self-esteem. It might not kick in for a couple of days, while multiple doses fought each other for control of my nervous system. I was going to get the second dose Thursday morning, to give me the best chance of being clear for the debate. But in come symbolic way I knew that after today, when I had the blood test, I would be looking over my shoulder half expecting some new humiliating surprise.

I tapped at my tablet. I wanted to talk to somebody, and I didn't know who it should be. Actually, a part of me said that the words didn't matter. What I really wanted was to be touched; but I knew that was something that I couldn't have right now. On the other hand, there was still a lock on my door. My fingers hovered over Clint's number, but I hesitated. He wasn't an early riser, and I'd found out over the last couple of days that if I called him first thing in the morning I was likely to wake his parents too. Even when I was actually there, it was sometimes hard to get him up first thing, and I didn't have the energy right now. Still, I could call Josh. I'd teased him on cam plenty of times already, and I was sure he would be happy to see me half naked again. A part of me knew that I shouldn't do this, because Clint would feel betrayed if he found out. But he wasn't here to satisfy me now, and it wasn't fair to make me abstain in the circumstances.

I knew that was wrong, but I didn't care. I called Josh, and started to get changed while I was waiting for him to pick up. I didn't need pyjamas or a dressing gown now; a white cami top was all I would be wearing, and I adjusted the position of the tablet to make sure he could see what he was getting.

"Lorna!" I couldn't read the emotion in Josh's voice here. Was he excited, surprised, or both? "I didn't expect to hear from you today."

"I can't help myself," I purred, trying to sound more seductive than desperate. But I knew something was wrong here. This wasn't like me, to be so embarrassed. "I just need... Look, I can see you got morning wood, so you don't need to come over all embarrassed. It's only natural. But don't tell my friends, right?"

"You mean don't tell your boyfriend?"

I froze, and just stared. I hadn't spoken to anyone at school in the last week, unless they tracked me down. I'd avoided Josh and his guys, as well as my old friends. Had I told anyone that Clint had stayed with me on that first night? And was he even my boyfriend? We'd had sex once or twice, but we'd never really talked about what it meant; whether this was a relationship or just satisfying my needs. There was a part of me that wanted to feel like it meant something, but I didn't know if it did. Who had I told who could have passed it on to Josh?