Between the Lines

Echoes in the Deep

    "Why don't you tell me what all this good is that you claim I have first?" Her eyes flickered as I stopped my pacing to face her. "Do you have any idea how long I was left out there, merely dangling out on a ledge of that man's creation? How many times I thought of simply letting go, of making this easier for everyone, including myself?"

    "Loki-"

    "You lied to me... For years..." I could feel my lips quiver as I shut my eyes, unable to look at her. "Did you ever once think that I should have been told?"

    "You know I did, I told you-"

    "You said I wasn't a monster. That you never liked the secrets, yet you continued to keep them. You could have told me; you could have decided to tell me on your own!"

    "Loki, that is not-"

    "Fair? What do you know of fair? You and him, and all the other gods of Asgard, are one and the same. Drunk with power, blinded to the truth; easy prey for much wiser wolves. I may have never acted out beyond childish pranks, never exploited such weaknesses, but I have heard everything. All that has ever been said about me, all that has ever been whispered against me, all the times you and Odin proved that your true feelings lay opposite of your claims. Even now you mock me, with your absurd sentimentality, your pretentious belief that I too am a gullible fool when I was the one left out in the cold by all of you!"

    "Loki-"

    "I am not finished! For years, you said your teachings were meant to help me to find some sun of my own, to allow me a reprieve from the shadows surrounding me; not once though did you ever stop to think that even with your teachings, your affections, of what it would mean if I did manage to steal a drop of sunlight from myself. Did it ever occur to you in all of your coddling that I didn't just need to hear that I was destined for greatness, but to feel it? You insisted on describing my worthiness to me at my weakest moments, never knowing the additional layers of torment it pressed upon me when words did not align with your actions, leaving me to question the very basis of my reality. And then, when I did manage to seize my opportunity to make you proud, to make him proud and show you both what you could never see in me yet so easily saw within Thor, I was tossed into an abyss!"

    "You chose that outcome. That was your choice, just as everything you have done has been." Her voice was raw, a thick edge like that of a blade slicing through her calmness as she came closer to the glass. "You may be able to fool yourself into believing otherwise, but you will never be able to fool me."

    "I never wanted to fool you," I admitted with a sigh. "All I ever wanted was for you and Odin to see me as I truly was; to love me for me instead of trying to make me like Thor."

    She shook her head, her face somber as she gazed at me. "I never wanted you to be anything but yourself. I have and will always believe that you can be and do anything..."

    "You could have fooled me..." I sighed then, turning away from her. I could still see her reflection in the glass pane to my left, her face sullen as she blinked away tears.

    "I will have some things brought down for you. Chairs, some tables, and food; perhaps a bed and books to occupy you."

    "You think frivolous amenities will comfort me? Do you truly know me at all," I asked mockingly.

       Lady Eir arrived before we could say anything further; a heavy basket clutched in her slender hands as she nodded at Mother. I watched as the guard moved down the way, opening Eibhlin's cell as the women entered. I tried not to focus on what they were doing, tried to remain calm as the silence grew and grew, not even the echoes of their gentle whisperings able to penetrate it. As several servants arrived, each with different bits of furniture and the like to be placed in both mine and Eibhlin's cell from the number of items, I saw Lady Eir leave; her gray eyes settling on my green ones for a moment as she offered me a knowing and gentle nod. Relief washed over me that Eibhlin would be alright, or as close to it as she could get.