He slides the paper over to me.
'Do you feel safe at home?'
I feel the familiar sting of tears welling up in my eyes. I can't answer that. If she finds out she's going to kill me. No that's not it, that's not why I'm so afraid. If she finds out she's going to kill karma and I can't let that happen. I manage a shaky nod and I can tell Karasuma doesn't believe me but he doesn't press me any further.
"Good, now let's begin. To start, how are your injuries? I know the last time we met you had a pretty nasty concussion."
"They're... healing. I still get really dizzy though"
"That's understandable, you hit your head pretty hard. While we're on that topic I'd like to know where you got the first head injury?"
"What do you mean?"
"When I searched for the main source of the bleeding there was already a bandage there. Can you tell me where it came from?"
"Oh, that.. heh.. I tripped?"
"Is that your final answer?"
"Y-yes"
"Ok kid... you know you can trust me right? I have the means to protect you if you're scared."
"Y-yeah. Thanks"
I bow my head in shame. Do I know that? He's a stranger. I can't trust him. I barely even know him! So why do I want to? Why do I want to trust him so badly? I don't get it.
Why does he care?
Why doesn't he hate me like everyone else?
He reminds me of karma, maybe that's why I trust him. It's not the same feeling I get when I'm around karma, but it's nice and warm, like a hug. It feels like life in the movies where the mom and dad actually love each other and the kids aren't just puppets for their mother's twisted pleasure. Where parents actually care about their children and protect them instead of hurting them.
Something about Karasuma feels like that. He is protection, safety. I shudder at the thought that this will all be over soon. He'll have everything he needs from me, the trial will end and then he'll be out of my life forever. The only adult that ever cared is just going to leave me behind. He'll abandon me just like my dad and I'll be left alone with her again. I don't want to be alone with her. She hurts me. I don't want to hurt. I'm tired of hurting. I just want to be normal for once.
I suddenly find myself unable to breathe. My hands start to shake and the room is spinning. My gaze shifts across the room in horror as I watch the walls warp around me. It feels like they're caving in around me, crushing me. I fall out of my seat and scramble into the corner, instinctively curling into myself burying my head in my knees and covering my ears just praying to whatever deity may hear to make it stop. Make it stop! MAKE IT STOP!
Then I feel his hand on my shoulder, tying me back to the earth like an anchor. The concern in his eyes is like a lighthouse and I feel myself being pulled towards it. I finally find myself grounded enough to hear what he's saying.
"Hey, kid. It's ok. It's ok. Just breathe ok? It's all gonna be ok. I promise I won't let anything happen to you. You're safe here. So just take a deep breath and focus on me. It's all gonna be ok." I feel myself calming down slowly. This was far from my first panic attack, but it's the first time an adult has ever helped me deal with one. It's usually just karma that helps calm me down. Something about detective Karasuma is so comforting. I find myself leaning into him and sobbing into his chest. He doesn't complain, so we just sit there, me breaking down, him trying his best to comfort me.
It takes a while but I do eventually regain my composure. Detective Karasuma helps me to my feet and leads me back to the chair across from his desk. He gives me a moment to breathe, stalling the inevitable. We've been here too long. She's going to catch on. He has to go get her, but before he leaves he makes sure that the chair my mother will sit in is as far away as possible. I give him a grateful smile, knowing he just bought me some very valuable time.
"Hey kid. I know it might be hard but I'm gonna need you to give your statement with your mom in the room."
My smile fades instantly. She's going to be here. She's going to know.
Despite only knowing me for a few days, Karasuma seems smart enough to realize when I'm about to spiral.
He looks at me conflicted. He's weighing his options, disliking both outcomes but trying to choose the better of the two evils. He seems to make his decision with a sigh.
"Before I bring her back in, do you prefer hot chocolate, coffee, or tea?"
"Oh, uhh coffee please."
"Any cream or sugar?"
"No thanks, just black is good"
"Good taste kid, two black coffees coming right up"
He gives me a wink and walks out the door.
Normally I would refuse such an offer. My mom has poisoned me one too many times for me to feel comfortable accepting stuff like that. The only thing she's never poisoned was coffee. I don't really know why. I think it had something to do with productivity. Regardless, it's one of the few things she hasn't ruined for me. I still remember my first hot chocolate. I was 5. We were going to a Christmas festival at the town square. I was dressed in a bright red velvet dress with matching ribbons in my hair. I hated it, but I had learned by that point that it's better to just let it happen than to resist. There was a booth handing out free hot chocolate. A kind stranger handed me one and complimented my mom on what a beautiful little girl I was. My first sip was filled with pure bliss. Then my mom noticed. She slipped something out of her purse and poured it in my drink. Poisoned is a bit of a strong word for what she did to me, drugged is perhaps a better term? Regardless, one moment I was peacefully enjoying my hot chocolate, the next I'm desperately gasping for air, writhing in pain on the snow covered ground, body going limp as a strange man drags me off into a darkened alleyway... then he... he-
I'm broken from my flashback by the gentle click of the door. Karasuma enters first, carefully handing me a warm cup of coffee and draping a blanket around my shoulders,giving me a reassuring smile. My mother follows not too far behind, taking a seat in the chair across the room.
Wip- no strings ch.4?
Start from the beginning
