jj maybank one shots

soon you'll get better

Tw: Mentions of death and cancer

The buttons of my coat are tangled in my hair, in the doctor's office lightning, I'm scared.

But I don't tell that to JJ, who is holding my hand from the seat he's sitting at, like his life is depending on it.

Well, my life really depends on the next words that are about to come out of the doctor's mouth.

The doctor looks at the papers in his hand, a look of pity surrounding his features. A look, I'm never gonna be able to forget for the rest of my life.

"Augustine, I'm sorry, but the test shows that you have cancer."

The world stops moving, and my ears start ringing, my hands go cold.

The doctor starts explaining something about the treatment and chemotherapy, but I can't listen, I just stare at my hands.

The next minutes went in a blur, I somehow got out of the doctor's office and got in the car, and now we're driving back to our house.

It's dead silent.

JJ holds my hand the entire time, a comfort I really need right now. But we don't exchange any words. He's probably afraid that I'm going to break.

But I don't feel like I'm going to break, I just feel numbness.

We get out of the car and go into the house, JJ helps me out of my clothes and lays me down on the bed, claiming that I need to rest.

I'm not sure if I'm ever gonna be able to sleep.

The sound of sniffling draws my attention to my boyfriend, who's lying with his back facing me.

I would've noticed how strange it was for him to lay without cuddling with me if I wasn't so lost in my own thoughts.

I gently touch his shoulder, which makes him turn to me. Then I see his red face and tears that are still falling from his eyes down to his cheeks.

I don't need to ask questions. His eyes tell me everything I need to know. So I just hug him.

He cries himself to sleep.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

For months, I pretend it isn't real.

I pretend like I'm not so sick that it drains all the energy out of me and sometimes makes me feel like I'm dying. I pretend like everything can go back to normal again.

I act like I'm not sick at all. That's why I didn't accept the treatment.

But JJ always reminds me how I should be looking after myself, he comes with me to all my appointments, and he takes care of me when my sickness gets me hospitalized.

I can see that he's suffering as much as I am, but he stays strong for me. He thinks that I can't hear him crying in the bathroom every night before sleep.

"Augustine, babe, are you sure about this? You shouldn't tire yourself out." He says, trying to convince me to stay while I'm already changing into my swimsuit, ready to go surfing with my friends.

"Yes, JJ, I'm not gonna sit on my ass and wait to die. I'm gonna go out, and I'm gonna live." The word death makes him flinch, but he hides it with a sigh.

He knows that I'm not gonna change my mind, so he accepts his fate and says something about me not leaving his side, but I'm too excited to listen.

I go running to the car. With my beach bag on my shoulder, a white dress that I wore on top of my bikini and my slippers on my feet, I finally felt happy after months.